Even women are carrying SAKs these days. They're just a handy tool to have around to help with lifes little everyday adversities. What kind of office is this anyway? Are there specially trained and certified individuals that are allowed to use letter openers? And that paper shear... (oh wait, that was removed last week 'cause it was a safety hazard).

You know, I joke about this, but: We've got a group at work that goes 24/7 in rotating shifts, so they've got a small kitchen for weekends and off hours. I stopped in there for a cup of coffee and there was woman who was frantically searching for the bagel slicer so she could have a bite before going on shift. I told here: "Kitchen knives are in that drawer over there." She said: "We're not allowed to use a knife on a bagel anymore, someone cut their finger last week." So, well, yeah, I guess knives are dangerous... Sheesh.