This reminds me of a time when there was a nice woman in my karate class who had been abused. She was reluctant to "spar" with anyone, but I finally convinced her to try it out with me and we built up rapport. After some very encouraging signs that she was "getting it" and was starting to come out of her shell, another guy in class got a little to carried away and didn't think about her situation. She never came back. I hate to see that happen because it tends to perpetuate the situation. I'd hate to see that happen here.
Something similar happened when I was helping teach a self defense class. There was one young woman who, by the way she was in the class had also been abused. As part of the class, we had the participants practice striking a kicking shield. When she was practicing each of the techniques, she looked as if she was trying to kill someone. It didn't seem like she was just really into the training, it looked she was thinking of someone she'd like to use the techniques on. I'm 6'3" and well over 300 pounds and she was hitting so hard that she was throwing me off balance...and she was an average sized woman. It really wasn't my business but I was concerned for her situation and wanted to recommend some local agencies that could help her if she was being abused. I was very concerned about her mental state.
In that respect, I highly recommend "The SAS Self Defense Handbook". It discusses the mental aspects of self defense as well as physical ones. It's straightforward and no nonsense and effective. Though the techniques should be practiced, they are simply "incapacitate the perp and get out of Dodge" techniques. Unfortunately there is still a need for such materials and training, but forutnately quality information is available.
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