Unfortunately my family has become acutely aware of the fact that one can carry a gun, know how to use it confidently, nail an armed criminal with it, and yet still be killed by that armed criminal. I've always wanted to train enough to be confident and comfortable with guns, despite this painful association, but I realize they are not the be-all, end-all of home/personal defense. Sometimes you can do all you can and still lose. I would hope that no one else here has come to realize that in the same way I have.