I'll sign that, about being stupid. Case in point, yesterday I was opening some boxes of supplies we had been waiting on for months (gotta love working for the government) and another employee came in and asked, "What's that?," pointing to my 79-cent boxcutter (you know the kind, the foldover piece of metal that holds one single-edged razor blace).
"It's a boxcutter," I replied, continuing to slash at the miles of packing tape.
"Like they used on 9-11?" she asked, her voice rising.
"No," I said, "I'm sure those were much nicer."
"But that could be dangerous!" she said, getting agitated.
"Only if you keep distracting me," I replied.
I found out later she went and complained to a supervisor that I had a deadly weapon. He came, took one look, and left laughing ...