I'm not a woman, nor do I play one on TV. I am, however, an avid cyclist, and I've taken many a female friend shopping for her first "adult" bicycle.

I highly recommend the "woman specific frames" that are out there. They are almost universally more comfortable for the women I know who ride, due to the differences in frame geometry discussed above (and I'm not talking about step-through frames - these look just like "normal" road bikes.) In my experience, Trek, Cannondale, and I believe Specialized all make mid-to-high end production bikes with frames designed for women. NO need to go bespoke.

Additionally, though this is a particularly personal decision, there are many bicycle saddles (the seat) designed specifically for women, with padding or cutouts in different places than on those designed for men. There is no way to predict which saddle is going to work best for your specific anatomy without trying them out, but I can tell you that taking the time to find the right one will make a world of difference! If you plan on using your bike for more than short rides around the neighborhood, find a sales person you're comfortable with and tell them EXACTLY where your saddle is causing discomfort, and they may be able to recommend something different. This is somewhere that working with a female sales person is likely a good idea, as she'll have more experience with what works for her and her friends.

As for other gear, my wife sleeps in the same tent as me, and when she decided she wanted to go backpacking, I took her to Campmor where they kitted her out with gear that fit, adjusting it specifically to her when necessary. Her pack is the same brand as mine, but smaller than mine, but then so is she. She has the same Asolo boots as I do, and our cargo pants and rain gear look pretty much the same. She makes me do all the cooking, but mostly because she's terrified of my white gas stove!