I too am torn between the desire to be 'stealthy' when camping, and the practicality of bright tools. For things that are normally kept inside my pack or pocket, especially very small things like lighters, I usually go for bright.

I have a bunch of gear that is mostly black but one brightly colored part, such as my gerber saw with an orange locking screw, and even that little bit of brightness helps a lot(without much reduction in 'covertness). I find that fluorescent yellow parachute cord is highly visible under most conditions and great for lanyards, and without a flashlight I find it easier to spot than retro-reflective cord. Retro-reflective cord for tent guy lines is wonderful.

I also have tritium trasers on all my backpacks, which do not stand out in the daytime but at night are visible at close range. They're nice because if I wake up at night groggy and disoriented, I immediately know where my pack is, and remember where my other gear is relative to that.

This post has me thinking, I should probably buy the orange rubber tailcap switch for my all-black Fenix...