Simmer pine bark 24 hours, then season with portions of braised tenderloin, roasted potatoes, spring carrots, and seasonings to suit - adapted from a traditional recipe for "nail soup".
Actually the best pine bark is harvested by virgins from trees growing on north facing slopes at an altitude between 7199 and 7329 feet in Shasta county, California, under an October full moon, with a wind of less than 10 mph. Get some of that stuff and it will come up a winner at your next bark tasting soiree...
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Geezer in Chief