Most items described are available in a Traditional Scottish Pub.
A billiard ball in a sock A good set of teeth - useful for biting and chewing off the soft flappy parts off your opponents body.
Associated sports equipment (Cricket Bat or Golf Sand Iron which is considered best especially if you keep it well sharp using a file.)
Your wife’s stiletto shoe heel. (Swung across the temple or crown of the head – most effective if done from behind)
A pencil in the eye. (Pointy Stick) Pencils are superior because once a length of pencil has been inserted into the body it can be broken off and reused elsewhere on the body.
A Pencil in the nose especially if pushed with some force upwards into the Sinus Cavity
A pub glass or broken bottle pushed into your assailant’s throat, neck or face. (aim for the carotid artery - assailants right ascending is best)
The Pointy end of a Dart - use as directed with Pencil - can also be thrown but not recommeded. You may miss and give your assailant an opportunity to do unto you want you was going to do unto him.
Billiard Cue - Generally has a sharper pointy end than a pool cue. Specifics not required here - will leave up to the imagination.
A leather belt or Boot Lace when used as a garrotte. (Best if used in combination with a stick i.e. Broom Stick)
Then there is the famous Glasgow kiss which as a last resort, should cause the assailant to fall to the ground whereby a swift kick into the genitals which is quickly followed up by jumping onto the assailants head. Sometimes the repeated elevation of a paving slab above the assailant’s head then releasing the paving slab under the influence of gravity is useful if you want to keep your shoes clean. Once the assailant is out cold you can then siphon some petrol from nearby car into a container i.e coke can and then set the assailant well alight. Chances are by this time the assailant will have been well disabled allowing you to make your escape.