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#31540 - 09/08/04 07:55 PM From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
Anonymous
Unregistered


- How to build an animal trap.
1) Procure a 2-foot-long wire and make a loop at one end. Wire is essential - animals can bite through string and twine.
2) Take the other end of the wire and pass it through the loop.
3) Twist and tie the end of the wire to a 1-foot stake. Stake the trap in an animal track or at the entrance to an animal burrow or hole.

There you have it, survival tips for the masses.

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#31541 - 09/08/04 09:09 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
rbruce Offline
Member

Registered: 05/25/04
Posts: 153
Loc: California
WOW!!! That explains it all. I think I am now an expert trapper. And to think, people make entire videos or books on this subject. Such a waste in time and energy. All that needed to be done was for somebody to come along with a three step process. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Robert

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#31542 - 09/08/04 09:14 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
GoatRider Offline
Old Hand

Registered: 08/28/04
Posts: 835
Loc: Maple Grove, MN
(Cut to a sign saying 'How to do it'. Music. Pull out to reveal a 'Blue Peter' type set. Sitting casually on the edge of a dais an three presenters in sweaters - Noel, Jackie and Alan - plus a large bloodhound.)

Alan: Hello.

Noel: Hello.

Alan: Well, last week we showed you how to become a gynaecologist. And this week on 'How to do it' we're going to show you how to play the flute, how to split an atom, how to construct a box girder bridge, how to irrigate the Sahara Desert and make vast new areas of land cultivatable, but first, here's Jackie to tell you all how to rid the world of all known diseases.

Jackie: Hello, Alan.

Alan: Hello, Jackie.

Jackie: Well, first of all become a doctor and discover a marvellous cure for something, and then, when the medical profession really starts to take notice of you, you can jolly well tell them what to do and make sure they get everything right so there'll never be any diseases ever again.

Alan: Thanks, Jackie. Great idea. How to play the flute. (picking up a flute) Well here we are. You blow there and you move your fingers up and down here.

Noel: Great, great, Alan. Well, next week we'll be showing you how black and white people can live together in peace and harmony, and Alan will be over in Moscow showing us how to reconcile the Russians and the Chinese. So, until next week, cheerio.

Alan: Bye.

Jackie: Bye.
_________________________
- Benton

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#31543 - 09/08/04 11:56 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
bountyhunter Offline


Registered: 11/14/03
Posts: 1224
Loc: Milwaukee, WI USA
Maggot:

In the interests of keeping the masses properly informed, which end of the 2 foot piece of wire do you make into a loop?

Do you other two guys know that you are not supposed to inhale Elk hair smoke? <img src="/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Bountyhunter <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

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#31544 - 09/09/04 01:46 AM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
groo Offline
Old Hand

Registered: 11/02/03
Posts: 740
Loc: Florida
Quote:
which end of the 2 foot piece of wire do you make into a loop?

The longer end. Duh.

<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

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#31545 - 09/09/04 12:03 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
Anonymous
Unregistered


Geeee ... I dunno, but it had a really, really cool little line drawing that showed what resembled a twist-tie near a kind of dubious-looking hole ...and the stake, can't forget the stake!

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#31546 - 09/09/04 02:00 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
brian Offline
Veteran

Registered: 07/28/04
Posts: 1468
Loc: Texas
The end on the left. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
_________________________
Learn to improvise everything.

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#31547 - 09/09/04 03:06 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
bountyhunter Offline


Registered: 11/14/03
Posts: 1224
Loc: Milwaukee, WI USA
Brian:

When facing me, is that your left or my left.

By the way, I am right handed and if you have a two foot piece already cut off, what's left?

Bountyhunter <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

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#31548 - 09/09/04 03:08 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
bountyhunter Offline


Registered: 11/14/03
Posts: 1224
Loc: Milwaukee, WI USA
Maggot:

I prefer chicken or pork, but if it is free, I won't forget the steak.

Bountyhunter <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

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#31549 - 09/09/04 03:29 PM Re: From my Worst Case Scenario calendar -
brian Offline
Veteran

Registered: 07/28/04
Posts: 1468
Loc: Texas
That would be your left and if you don't prepare properly then you could still end up grabbing the wrong end. Nobody said this was easy...did they? I'm left-handed so I have no clue how to complete the procedure as a right-handed person. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
_________________________
Learn to improvise everything.

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