What items do you keep on your bedside table for convenience or emergencies?

Next to my digital clock, I keep a bottle of water or a sports drink, ChapStick, a D-Cell MAG-LITE, and a glow stick ready to open, break, and shake as a backup for the flashlight.
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I'm not sure whose twisted idea it was to put hundreds of adolescents in underfunded schools run by people whose dreams were crushed years ago, but I admire the sadism. -- Wednesday Adams, Wednesday