I hear you, Chris - but if you REALLY want attention from the TSA, just go with your kids to the gate to see them off to visit the ex. Some more enlightened airlines let you do that now, but to the TSA, that makes you a major threat since God alone knows what you might try to do in the terminal. Not only did my kids get the complete shakedown at the ticket counter and the security checkpoint, but I was all but stripped naked even thought I wasn’t getting on the plane. The big, beefy SFB screener who wanded me, after I had taken off my shoes, etc., said he had to “resolve an issue” around my waist … the metal zipper on my shorts! He had me pull my shirt up and proceeded to pat around my waist … firmly … and after about a minute of this I told him, very politely and calmly, that unless he wanted to lose the use of that hand forever he’d best finish up. I was promptly waved through. Sheesh!