look into honey and peanut butter. both fit all of your requirements. plus you can find them in handy little single serve packets. they should last until the sun turns into a red giant and then goes super nova.

/edit
oops forgot about allergies. might want to reconsider this post. honey ain't good for pregnant women and children under 2. also some people are allergic to peanut butter. let me think on this one some more and i'll post with others