Hello, everyone. TeacherRO, I know you're surprised to find yourself here amongst all your friends. The first thing I want you to know is that we're gathered here because we care so much about you. The second thing is that your flashlight collection has really changed you and affected each and everyone whom you love and who loves you. Yes, this is an intervention.

Now we're going to go around the living room counterclockwise, starting with bacpacjac, and let you know how your flashlight addiction has impacted our lives...

Jacquie?