Originally Posted By: Chisel
As far as calming everyone in any situation, it only solves the immediate situation but does nothing to "fix" some people's mentality as to guarantee it won't happen again. Some people are soooooo self-centred and narrow minded , and this shows on most of their behaviour.


Agreed. Getting calm so that you can talk only works with people who are capable of meaningful communication.

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Imagine a messy situation where someone goes hystrical and makes it more messy. You work hard, and finally solve the problem, and that person just says : ahhhhh, I was praying all the time, and God has answered my prayers. Taking credit is the least problem here. Those persons NEVER feel that they are part of the problem; the bigger part of it in fact.


I have regretfully concluded that I need to exclude those people from my life to the extent practical. Whether or not they can be fixed I don't know, I sure know that it isn't my job to fix them and I should be spending my time on things and people that won't drive me nuts. Honestly I just do not have the patience to maintain relationships with purported adults who cannot or will not take responsibility for their lives. You may find that you don't need to take that kind of approach.

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Sorry chaos, I will have to ask you to explain this part because I didn't understand what you meant.


Many people find it helpful to know about the MBTI personality types and where they themselves fit on the four axes. For example, I'm ENTJ: mildly Extroverted, almost neutral on Sensing vs. iNtuitive, moderately Thinking and strongly Judgemental -- and I knew that without taking an MBTI instrument in no small part because I've studied psychology in college. If you're not sure where you fit on one or more of these axes, you may find taking an MBTI instrument useful, even if it's one of the free online versions.

More helpful may be to figure out where the others in your life are on these axes. One of my daughters is INFP and approaches many things from a very different perspective than me. This informs my parenting approach with her.

Here's a decent-enough explanation: http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html.

Keep in mind that with just about everything related to human brains and personalities the MBTI oversimplifies. Think of it as a framework to begin understanding rather than the Rosetta Stone of personality.