I am supposedly in a vacation, and was looking for at least one day of complete rest. Mental and psychological rest , that is.

Last few days I was doing jobs and errands that I couldn't during work days, and thought that it was a good idea for the "vacation within vacation". So, I grabbed my GHB and camping bag and headed to s beach/camping ground that belongs to the establishement I work for. It was safe with a gate and guard, it had clean bathrooms , yet it was empty and just like a deserted island.

I reached there and was greated by the guy at the gate. And I started looking for the best cabin there is.

Other than the guard, there was a guy roaming around and cleaning. I saw him before on a previous visit with my kids, and have appreciated his work in that desolate place in the sun and the wind. So I gave him some money and food.

This time, I saw him , but was in no mood for company. So, I stopped the car near a cabin and headed to the bathrooms. He was coming towards me . grrrrr. Doesn't look like a good start. OK, he said : Hello, and I said likewise , and disappeared in the bathroom.

Five minutes later I came out, didn't see him , so I headed to the car. I took out a few things and put them on the picnic table. Then stood there thinking where to put the stove.

Suddenly the guy showed up, and right away started cleaning the cabin. Dust was all over and my mood turned cloudy. I asked him to stop , the cabin is OK. But he insisted the cabin needed cleaning.

Either he was sincerely appreciating my gift of last time and realy trying to do something for me, or he was looking for another handout. But it didn't matter at that point, and I carried my (still unpacked) stuff and left.

Grrrrr.... It would have been a magnificient day, all by myself and my BOB.

Morale of the story : don't ever be kind or generous if you cannot bear the consequences !!!

BTW, this was not the first time something like this happens. But it is one thing to happen at work or the market, and another thing to happen when you need to relax and be alone.

I am used to giving the needy. Just before heading towards that campground, I stopped at a shop and bought a few things including a box of 3-in-1 packets of Nescafe (coffee + sugar + creamer).

A low-income laborer was also there buying a few things including ONE packet of 3-in-1. He was talking to the cashier who was from his country in their own language, so I didnt know what was going on, but opened my 3-in-1 box and gave him 2 packets.

Luckily I don't know the guy and he doesn't know me. And there is a slim chance of meeting again. It is good to give, but not so good when the guy sticks to you like super glue.

My new rule is : never give a handout at a place you expect to visit again.

This is a valauble lesson for those with preps about what may happen when SHTF and there is more people who don't have anything.

No good deed goes unpunished!

It is always better to trade something to someone who needs than to just give that something to someone.

Wildman, I like to give people who have lower income. It is one way to feel the blessing of being middle class. I am not a millionaire or even close, but psychologically feel that I have all the money I need.

We should find a way to balance giving the needy, while also protecting ourselves from leeches.

Also, I am still looking for a way to spend one day ALONE.
Seems harder than I thought.

I agree with your feelings. Avoiding the making of leeches is the problem.

I learned from a church that the person in charge of the benevolence fund was the most coldhearted person they had. He could see through a scam in a second. He was able to propose creative ways of getting the person help in exchange for some labor, which they usually refused; do some janitorial work, kitchen work, wash a car, things like that. That weeded out the scammers.

Now, that is not to say that those who received help had to do labor. It was just a tactic that he was able to successfully use when needed.

In fact, those who received the help were often given access to some basic financial counseling, job leads, and other such services to help them return to self-sufficiency.

That is so true. Just disappearing causes too many problems; though it is easy to do.

A bunch of years back we took a vacation to Panama City Beach, FL. It consisted of me, DW, DS, and one of DS's friends. I told DW that all I wanted to do was: eat scrambled eggs, sausage, English muffins with orange marmalade, and tea every morning. That is all I wanted to do. No running around, no beach stuff. We were lucky in that there was beach reclamation going on. I watched it for hours on end from the balcony. But, I still had to do some things, but not a lot. I got lucky. I hope you are able to get some decompression time.

I don't know that I can spot a scammer, and I know I don't have the time to figure people out case by case. So when I do give charitably, it goes towards organizations like Red Cross or Save the Children. (It's not like I'm a millionaire or anything, but I try to help once in a while.) This method may shield you from problematic individuals, Chisel. Are there such organizations where you live?

Bingley: it is tough to "decode" the individuals. I was speaking earlier from a strictly organizational level. Anyway, I hope we all are able to help when we are presented with the opportunity. Caveat dator!

Yes, Bingley, there are many of them. And that is what I do most of the time. For example, in our culture we cannot adopt kids in the same way you do in the west (giving them our names ..etc.) but there are organizations that arrange different programs of orphan sponsorship. My wife & I have been sponsoring two orphans in the form of paying their expenses only. There are "advanced sponsorship" programs like we visit those orphans in their homes and check how they are doing in school ... etc. I have also proposed different types of orphan programs like homeschooling ..etc.

In addition to that I do support two households who are relatives. In both cases , father is dead and kids are either too young or have special needs.

Still, other situations pop up all the time, and that is when things are not really clear cut. You cannot see who is real or fake. My first rule in these cases : I don't give anyone who is asking. They can ask for gov assitance or charity assistance. In both cases someone visits their homes and check before giving them anything.