While you are trying to figure things out, your sobbing spouse has made a 911 call. Now what? Tell 911 to forget it [they won't of course]? Get into an argument with your spouse about the embaressment [I hope not]? Tell your spouse she and the baby are on their own while you leave them to solve the problem yourself the because you are a real man [not]?

Wouldn't there be a sweep of the maze by its proprietors come dark? Isn't there normally a count of who goes in and who comes out?

Me [hoping never to be in that situation], I'm considering tearing up / sawing off and lighting a few isolated corn stalks on fire; figuring that will deter bugs, light my way out, and probably get a lot of quick attention from the proprietors!