I don't see much point to regret. Looking back at a situation it is easy to see things I could have done differently. But, unless I'm going to entertain the idea that I screwed up on purpose, and secretly desired the extra heaping helping of pain and inequity, it is pointless. Generally, people, including myself, do about as well as they can given the situation and how they understand how things work.

We are not limitless beings. We get hurt, and the pain distorts our reality. But, for us, at the time, it is our reality and the only thing we have to work with. We end up fearing figments of our imaginations while the real monsters lurk around the corner undetected. After the fact it is all very clear we were paying attention to the wrong things but all you can do is the best you can and hope it is enough.

All you can do is try to understand what you can understand, admit your failures, learn from them, and try to do better next time. The goal is not, must not be, perfection. Because that way lies craziness, and bitter disappointment. You will never get there. What you can do is keep getting better. Everyone can do a little better even as we admit that everyone is damaged and distracted. That is about as good as it gets.