The expectations you list will require you to invest a lot of time learning about dogs and dog training before starting on a project with expectations that seem to be at or above those for most working dogs (i.e service dogs, police dogs). Just finding the right dog will be a major undertaking since even with proven training methods and very experienced trainers most service dog candidates get disqualified during the training. Even those that pass the training will only be paired with a compatible human partner.

Frankly I don't think your expectations are realistic, but with the right dog and a lot of time and effort you could probably get a lot what you need (not want) if you are willing to invest the effort. Their are lots of training methods out there and you will need to research them to see what works for you. As a starting point please go to the bookstore or Library and get "How To Be Your Dogs Best Friend" by the Monks of New Skete.

Training isn't everything. My German Shepherds have always been well trained dogs but none of them would meet the needs you list above even though they were very smart dogs. All of them have figured out how to fit in with our family and they have been amazing in their care and support of my son who has multiple physical and cognitive challenges in his life and loves his four legged friends. Partnerships are about give and take, not just a list of expectations.

-Eric