You are clearly over-thinking this.
Any hardware store has a selection of pry bars that will do the job. Avoid the discount bin $5 numbers and you will have something to work with. If you need further reassurance buy one with a brand name on it for a few dollars more. Stanley, Eswing, Plumb are all solid brands but be aware that many store brands are made by the same companies without the label and paint job.
You could select a decent one purely by price. Average the prices and select the one closest to average price or slightly above.
You could do it by sound. High quality tempered steel will ring clear and bright. Softer steels will have a dull tone. Take off your belt, hang the unit up, tap with a hammer. Listen.
You could check it by ordeal. Check for over hardness and tempering by smacking the thin tip into the concrete floor gently but firmly. If it chips it isn't properly tempered. If it dulls it isn't properly hardened. How this goes over with the store owner is up for grabs.
Don't get hung up on the ends being sharp or the smooth paint job. If you want sharp you grind or file them. Most people who use them don't need or want them sharp. If you want that a minute with a side grinder will get you a better edge than spending more money.
It is, in vernacular, a crowbar, a wrecking bar (Yes, technically there are differences), an implement of destruction, a club, a crude hunk of steel you pound and pry walls apart and doors open with. A good pry bar should mobilize your inner barbarian, make you want to tear something up. Holding one your vocabulary should shift toward the monosyllabic, possibly the profane. Shakespeare would grunt unintelligibly and flex hi muscles while holding a good bar. You're not buying a piano.
http://www.homedepot.com/webapp/wcs/stor...ocStoreNum=8125http://hand-tools.hardwarestore.com/67-416-wrecking-bars/stanley-fatmax-wrecking-bar-115290.aspxhttp://store.gsfasteners.com/mayhew-4100...amp;language=enEven at less than $16 I've had good luck with the Mayhew 36" on both construction and demolition projects. I didn't recognize the name so much as the paper label. The yellow and black logo is distinctive on a new tool. I've got a 3' of the same make and model in my truck and another in my tool kit at home. Not the most refined tool but solid and capable.
The Stanley version of a plain goose neck is very similar and may be the same thing with a bit of yellow paint added. The Stanley Fatmax is a step up with an oblong cross-section that gives it a little more stiffness but there are look-alikes off-brands that are on sale with a similar section and performance. Often similar right down to the forge marks.
For man-pack survival and rescue use I prefer a good quality spring-steel flat-bar. Cheap and lighter a flat bar doesn't roll so much used one-handed, can be used as a hoe to rake out debris and dig. The ninety degree bent end is easily hammered into any gap, with a hammer if necessary, with the sides of the blade working as both resistance arm and fulcrum. Used that way the blade is less likely to slip out.
As for any insult ... if I was working on being insulting there would be no doubt. If there is any doubt; there is no insult intended.