After re-reading I think I get your point now (which was also the purpose of this thread). What I had hoped for was a discussion of options other than guns that would allow a decisive defense without killing the attacker/invader, avoid accidentally killing a family member (I would be very interested on statistics along this line if anyone has any - I would much rather have a family member incapacitated for 30 minutes from a blast of pepper spray as opposed to lying dead on the floor), and lessen or eliminate any legal ramifications after the fact. At least a part of my goal has been achieved I think. Everyone has made some great points so far. It is very appreciated (and yes I am taking notes).
Being non-lethal (as opposed to less lethal as the point is to avoid killing) you obviously still have an annoyed bad guy to deal with, as others have already pointed out. Thus the non-lethal option probably needs to be coupled with an "exit and escape" strategy or something similar as Arney pointed out on page 1. On the other hand, if you would keep the bad guy in your sights when using a gun wouldn't you also keep your pepper spray or whatever aimed at the bad guy as well? If you are aware of a time frame for the effectiveness and no help has arrived why not just give the attacker/invader another blast? Food for thought; let the discussion continue.

P.S. For the record I do think pepper spray or similar is the next best option for a decisive outcome. Any opinions on which is best? Will a canister from Wally World do or is there a better alternative? Also more thoughts on any legal ramifications, even those specific to your area. If I am beating the dead horse, so to speak, let me know.