can you survive a zombie apocalypse?

http://www.nationalpost.com/news/story.html?id=1894905

mathematicians calculated the humans have little chance of survival.

What would you prepare for zombie apocalypse.

I agree that handling a problem like that would be similar to any other disease control. But a more likley scenario to zombies would be how do you deal with the hoards of hungry people around you if some disaster were to affect the infrastructure. I wonder what the mathematicians would say about that?

No.



Mathmegicians can prove anything - and I'm not being derogatory; if the model is right and the math is right, you've got it figured out. Problem is that the model's always flawed.



Keep tools to destroy the staircase up to my third story apartment. The problem there is that I'm pretty much confined to my third story apartment (even though I can tie a lot of knots while on rope, behind my back, hanging upside down in the rain - I can exist in the vertical world)... yup. Still confined. Still doomed.

Does anybody out there have a happy ending?

Bringing up infrastructure problems is a good point. Unless you can go completely off the grid and find a way to isolate yourself from refugees, people carrying a disease, ect; the chances of surviving any type of deadly pandemic are pretty slim and rely heavily on luck.

It actually amazes me how overtaxed we've allowed some of our infrastructure systems to become. For example, our power grid. Near cities, in the summer, we experience brownouts and blackouts simply due to the extra strain that comes from people using their air conditioning units. Now Chevrolet is bringing out a car that runs off of electrical power from the same electric grid. If we're having blackouts now, imagine how taxed the system will become if people are running their a/c units and charging their cars at the same time? Makes me glad I have a generator and fuel on hand.

Chicken Turds & Clorox will suffice for Most Frontal Zombie Attacks,Poly-styrene w/Acetone/M.E.K. & a few Bottle Rockets w/Beehive reports should take care o' the rest!

Now that have hung out with the New York Chapter of Zombie Squad, I'd say there is a moderate increase in my chance of survival. It's good to have a more all-hazards approach to life.

Lots and lots of bird shot rounds for my shotgun. Go for head shots, or leg shots to slow them down. I think they eat their wounded. Then once the immediate area is cleared, start for the nearest Walmart, taking shotgun. Stock up on more ammo and food. Thems with the ammo gets the food.

Then to the nearest HD/Lowes, wall making stuff. Try to get concertina wire from nearby army post. Improvise molotov cocktails and claymores. Pungi pits too. Build a small fire base and expand as needed.

Can we make this the newest survival series on Discovery??

check out todays Boing-Boing site for a math model of zombie outbreaks..

The vast majority of zombies have problems raising their feet and when they fall they have difficulty getting up. Some stout wire strung on stakes as tangle foot can slow your average wave of zombies down to a crawl. This gives you time for carefully aimed shots. Or to bonk them with a club.

Always keep a sturdy club handy. An axe handle doesn't jam or overheat and it will keep working after the ammunition is long gone.

Thank you Canoedogs for the Boing Boing alert.

The paper
http://www.mathstat.uottawa.ca/~rsmith/Zombies.pdf
is an interesting read.
I have not worked all the way through it yet. So far not bad at all. (Yes, Zombies are a fine metaphor. I have no problem with that)
I am sure I will question some of their assumptions, but it is a good example of the math problems and is quite clearly worked out.

edit: I am especially disappointed at how little effect quarranteening Zombies seems to have, and that is without any loose vectors.

To late for me- BRAAAAAAIINSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hmm got a good fence an accurate scoped .22lr rifle and can get on my roof kinda easy with a ton of ammo and plenty food and water stored. They might get me in the end but the pile of bodys outside my fence will make the great wall of china look tiny.

Most of the zombie problem could be avoided if we just voted them all out of office and went back to minimal government. A small group of zombies can be controlled far better than the number we have now.

I might not be able to kill them with it, since they're already pretty much dead, but the Ruger 10/22 I bought Friday evening would at least make for a little target-shooting fun.

I love the scene from Dawn of the Dead where they're on the roof and the guy on the other roof is sniping the zombies that look like celebrities.

And lest we forget, the vegan zombies will strip the land of any edibles, especially in the Midwest. Late at night you will hear them... Grains...Grainssss

The tofulope is in trouble.

Most of the paper says that if people are turning into zombies, and the zombies never turn back into people, eventually everyone will be a zombie. Which doesn't seem very helpful or insightful.

Well that is right, unless you can kill all the Zombies before they eat everybody.
That is explored where they talk about impulse like action effects, near the bottom of the paper.
I agree that the scenario they paint is not very encouraging. I think it might be useful because does point out that some expectations, like the effectiveness of isolation or quarantine, might be false.
I forget what they gave as examples of possible real life Zombies, but the modeling can be applied to quite a few problems.

Their point was that they were able to apply the model in a more general way than is usual. Most models only have one activity going on, they have two. Not only are they modeling infection rates, they are modeling resistance and healing too.
The way they have done it allows you to put as many mass actions like that into your model as you need.
I am not a mathematician, but this seems quite interesting.

That bat that they used on Shaun of the Dead looked pretty good. Was that a Cricket bat? Apologies to all that play it if I misspelled it...

In determining the proper response it is often best to model the dynamics of a system and to see what the numbers tell you. Fortunately someone has done this for zombies. Follow the link to the pdf at:

http://scienceblogs.com/neurotopia/2009/08/best_modelling_paper_ever.php

I am shocked, SHOCKED, that the moderators have not taken down this zombie thread. I thought those were verboten here.

I love it.

Besides being a part of Zombie Squad, I read Max Brooks 'opus', World War Z. Which goes into great detail on how society makes do during the zombie war.

Just keep on brewing my N-Stoff and build my fortress and I am all set.

As Ironraven goes screaming and running off into the night. Yes, zombies can learn to fear, heh heh heh...

I would use a machete as back up weapon. I would stock up lots of ammo on assault rifle.

It seems that a catapult or trebuchet loaded with rocks would make a good weapon. I've certainly got enough rocks....

You guys are all thinking too small, think bulldozers with protected cabs, automatic tree processors, the ones that take whole trunks and chop the life out of them and my personal all time favourite, the Aardvark mine flail.

http://www.landmineclearance.com/page3.html

Moar ??
Opps wrong forum this is the one where I have to try and be mature about what I say.

I should think give the right prepreation anything could be survived it's just what your level you feel is confortable for you.

Of course there are some things you may not want to survive.

Oo, oo, let me jump in before the thread locks...

World War Z introduces the critical survival mechanism imo - zombies eventually rot away. The math study doesn't account for this with a time element in their equations - if all you have to do is outlast zombies, its simply a matter of provision and protection for t amount of time, something simple like

survival = x(t) provisions + y(t) protection - rnd odds of failure of x / y

Safest place - an unscaleable elevation, with a cache of food and water for the duration.

If a zombie rots, he is not your enemy - avoid him, they will eventually go away. I wish I could remember the quote exactly, probably Henry the II:

"He has launched the arrow, and the safest path is to avoid its aim."

Um, I would think a green cloud that melts everything organic it contacts would be more than sufficient. You don't just want to destroy them, you want them running away in fear, right? Ask Ironraven or Blast about Chlorine Tri-Flouride, aka N-stoff.

You make that, I leave town.
Hell, I'd leave the state!
-Blast

Sorry Ben, you and your Fog of Hell are on your own. I'm heading to Johno's when the zombies come!

-Blast

Yeah, I know. I have this philosophy. When it comes to terror, I don't like being in 2nd place. To defeat your enemy, it is much sweeter if you first strike fear into their hearts, or whatever they may have that can know fear.

If you see zombies run screaming by, looking over their shoulder and pointing, you will know what they are pointing at.

I guess I'd just have to resort to taking headshots on them. Meh, target practice is always more fun with moving targets anyway.

OK, so now I am waiting for Ninja Defense and Gecko 45 (The Mall Ninja)to show up.

More than welcome my friend, bring some diesel, about 5000 gallons and we could mash tens of thousands of them.

Hmm, boys and their toys. I hope you use some of that diesel to cook off the glop. Zombie goo can get pretty mucky I hear.

Not a problem, remember I work for an oil company!

-Blast

I suggest finding whatever it is about brains they're attracted to and synthetically reproduce it somehow. Then, figure out a means of communication, create some sort of reward system, and bingo! you've got unlimited free labor. Hmmm, I think I'd look good traveling on a throne carried by zombies....

Trying to domesticate zombies, I don't think that's a good idea. Best just to be rid of them.

Besides, every time it rains you get the wet Zombie smell and it is far worse than the wet dog smell.

You cant leave them out in the rain, its against their unhuman rights. I can imagine the PETZ law suites already.

And then some lonely guy would open up the whole human/zombie cohabitation can of worms and its all downhill from there. And to think I was gonna open the first zero emissions, eco-friendly zombie factory.