For someone in their mid-40s, in good health, that never had any type of self-defense training... what would be some recommended sources (DVDs, books, or other) where a person might gain some knowledge of defensive skills and techniques?
Military style techniques?, martial arts?, combination? ... I have no idea.

Mostly, I would plan on using a fireman to defend myself.
But, what happens in a situation where a gun/rifle is not available, and a hand-to-hand confrontation is on?
I have no desire to be a "fighter", but I think it would be nice to have some knowledge of defensive techniques, and develop some physical defensive skills.

Whatever you choose, It must first be mental and then it must be hands on. Hand to hand is decidedly not fun. One will come away sore even if you win.

When I was an MP, I would look for every opportunity to talk people out of their mischievous intentions prior to going down that road. As a last resort I would always let them know that at the end of the day, I was going "home" and they were going to the "D Cell". The only variable in that outcome was how sore the both of us and all of my back-up were going to be.

Just curious, If you are big enough to get a fireman to submit to being carried around to defend you why are you worried about hand to hand. You'll just scare the bad guys away.

Take a look into Krav Maga. All of the IDF uses it, and they have been fighting since the country was formed.

Check the NRA website. They have a lot of info on where to go for firearms training and such.

Google search your area for self defense training. If you are urban, you should have a lot of hits.

Bruce Lee's Jeet Kune Do is a good philosophical book about effective fighting. An interesting place to start anyways. Probably the most intuitive way for an uninitiated combatant to understand how to fight, and one of the most difficult things for a seasoned and well trained technical fighter to learn.

Brazilian jiu-jitsu is taught to many law enforcement and military personnel. Its advantage is that it teaches you how to fight from both good and bad positions, and you get nearly full-force (minus punches, kicks, etc) sparring (called "rolling") every class. It's hard to beat real experience against a fully-resisting opponent.

This is an excellent forum with many threads comparing judo with similar martial arts:

Judo Forum

Oops, that's some typo, huh?
Yes, if I could carry a "fireman", he could probably protect me with that mean looking axe! ... and just think how fit I would become, carrying that guy around all day.

It was a nice laugh in an otherwise grey day

I have to agree with Desperado, an Isreali art is the way to go.

I've experimented with a few styles and Krav Maga and the FIGHT system have been the best for me. They are no nonsense and brutal.Unfortunately, I've moved and the classes aren't offered where I live.

FYI,the FIGHT DVDs and guidebook are pretty good.

Some links for you.

http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Krav-Maga...2940&sr=8-1

http://kravmaga.com/

http://www.commandokravmaga.com/

http://www.fight2survive.com/

http://www.kapapacademy.com/

Another style is Systema. It is a Russian system used by their SF fellows. Mostly using the opponent's weight and movement against them. It really reminds me of another branch on the Krav Maga tree.

Still and all, I want you to remember that the first step is mental. You must decide that there is no other course of action (Including Running Like Hell), then you have to commit 100%. I was taught that once the fight starts, you are dead. It is then up to you to fight your way back to life. It isn't pleasant, and you will get hurt even if you wind up winning. The other disadvantage is over confidence. I have seen the most mature, level headed folks leave unarmed self defense class and get their butt whipped that night in a bar after 1 beer and 1 bad decision too many.

I am 5'9" and was 200 lbs. when I tusseled with my old MP partner's wife. Turns out she is a jailer for a larger metropolitan police department. Little munchkin of a woman kicked my butt all over their backyard and rubbed my nose in mud after I just wouldn't quit taunting her to wrestle. Pain and Compliance took on a whole new feel that night.

I appreciate your comments about the mental aspects of defense. I have never been in a physical fight in my life, nor would I ever go looking for one.
My interest in having an improved chance of defending myself, would only be for a situation where conflict could not be avoided.
I think that the odds I would ever have to rely on such skills are very very low. But, better to have some preparation.
I am always looking for ways to stay in shape too; and I imagine that improved fitness would be an added bonus of such training or skills development.

I am looking for something too. I would like to train thaibox but there is one thing that discourages me and that´s quite high possibility of the the brain damage. I cannot afford to lose my brain cells or go to the doctor after every sparring in order to make sure that I haven´t suffered concussion. I have heard a few scary stories from boxers (they were not even professionals). And there is also scentific research that cannot be overlooked even though some boxers like to do that - they will tell you that it is not true and box is 100% safe.

I am considering some reality based or military system and maybe some grappling style as an addition. KAPAP caught my eye ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwrAwzdf_nc ). There are some elements from thaibox in this system like the low kick which is very effective.

However there is no RBSD club near my home. I think I would have to travel to one-shot seminars if I can find something good.

The thing is an instructor matters more than a style.

Though you can´t really gain much just watching videos, this DVD could be worth checking out - SAS Fight Secrets ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOTwg_YXYy0 ). One could possibly catch some concepts and moves from it.

Like many people I want to learn this stuff as a last resort skill when there is no other choice but fight.