Burt Gummer is THE survival man.
Okay, maybe I'm crazy after all. Wrote this in response to all the hoopla in Los Angeles over their attempts to outlaw the 50 caliber BMG rifle, bullets, and such:

The Ballad of Burt Gummer (Tremors) Sung to Kodachrome

When I think back on all the rounds I've fired since high school
It's a wonder I can hear at all
And if you think there's such a thing as too much firepower
You should see the Graboid on my wall

BMG it shoots those big brass bullets
I use it for concealed carry
It makes me feel safe when driving through L.A. (oh yeah)
I've got a Grizzley Big Bore
It weighs about thirty pounds
Oh L.A. don't take my BMG away

If you took all the girls who've been through weapons training
And brought them to my camp for just one night
You know they'd never match my sweet lil Heather Gummer
Cause she's the best girl in a firefight

BMG it shoots those big brass bullets
I use it for concealed carry
It makes me feel safe when driving through L.A. (oh yeah)
I've got a Grizzley Big Bore
I love to take it everywhere
Oh L.A. don't take my BMG away

L.A. don't take my BMG
I hear those Shriekers after me
L.A. don't take my BMG away
L.A. don't take my BMG, oh, no
L.A. don't take my BMG away

Regards, Keys
P.S. Does outer space survival count? Ripley is way cool in the Alien movies, though it's hardly wilderness stuff.