I'm at Trader Joe's this morning ( for our overseas members, TJ's is a grocer selling liquor, upscale cheese,bread and 'goodies' vs staples.)Today is 'Pirate Day' yet another new holiday when people dress like pirates.I'm at the complimentary coffee stand flirting with this cute pirate when we heard shouting.
Two Trophy Brides got into it over our two candidates ( somehow I am voting for a third?) and starting beating on each other with their purses.
Managers broke it up and called the police. I'm standing there, looking at the scattered cultural artifacts of 'the good life' and realise a $100 is at my feet.The yuppies around here like to buy latte's with $100 bills and then pay the minimum on their credit cards with the balance.
My Pavlovian reflex was to turn it over. I heard Johnny Depp whisper in my ear " Chris, this is PIRATE DAY."
I put my foot over the bill and retrieved it at an opportune moment.
I had turned in my recyclables previously and was getting rotational items for my BOB; dark organic chocolate, Earl Grey Tea, summer sausage; stuff those Red Cross Bags don't include.
I augmented my purchase with a bottle of Laphraiog single malt, filled my gas tank for the first time in months and had cash left over.
I saw my homeless friend playing his clarinet on the freeway offramp. I stopped ahead, walked back and slipped him a $20 bill.
It was the christian thing to do. It was the pirate thing to do. It was the Christian Pirate thing to do.
I think we all know who the REAL pirates are. I'll let this thread remain, just don't be so indelicate as to name the specific pirates.
Everybody say ARGGGGGGG!!!!!!