ha. Careful what you ask for. This guy is crazy enough to try and send it to you.
In that case,
Dear Santa Taurus, I've been a very good boy this year. I've taught my 4-yr old DD1 firearm safety and haven't killed my wife's cat. In light of this could you please bring me the following stuff for
St. Barbara's Day?
1. 50 meters of detcord
2. 5 kg of C4
3. 1 case of detonators
4. 4 cases of inciderary charges
5. 3 AK-47s (one for me, DW and DD1)
6. 30,000 rounds of ammo
7. 6 Claymore mines
8. 2 .50 rifles (any make/model, automatic prefered)
9. 2,000 rounds of ammo (20,000 rounds if automatic)
10. an Easy-Bake Oven
I promise I won't put my eye out or anything like that and I'll share the yummy cakes I make with my wife and kids!
Your friend,
-Blast