What do I mean by that? Well let me explain.

I realized last night that much of my survival gear is based on my readings in books and online and purchased either impulsively or because I convinced myself I couldn't do without it (I'm VERY good at this). I also realized that this has led to my having a plehtora of stuff. Now for me I use all of this stuff when I camp or hike or at least try to so that I'm familiar with it and will know how to use it when the time comes that my life may depend on it. The desire to use all of it has led to a hiking pack which (in the rare case it's fully loaded) weighs 50-60 lbs. Had I been blending my 'this is nice to have' camping gear with hiking gear and with survival gear thinking of ALL of it as survival gear...as required? I think I may have been...my lust for gadgets and gear may be interfering with reality! The shock nearly killed me.

This led to my repacking my bags last night (for the zillionth time in the last 2 months). I realized that I don't need half of it to actually 'survive' or even to do many of the things I enjoy doing outdoors. Possibly much less than half. I started really thinking hard about each item before putting it back into my bag...I could commit to so few items that I ended up not packing anything.

I recalled the pyramid in the SAS Survival Guide. Of all the things needed for survival he puts 'kit' at the very tip...a tiny piece of the picture. I wondered just how many things I could do away with for the purpose of survival...which led me to wondering how much stuff I could do away with for hiking, camping, or for good. This became a very frustrating exercise and resulted in my dreaming of myself like Bear Grylls running wildly through the woods with nothing but a canteen a knife and a flint...and no clothes of course. I don't think it helped that I was watching Season 1 of Survivorman before going to bed and was able to see Les Stroud naked in at least one episode.

This morning my thoughts wandered to this topic again (as you can tell by this extremely verbose post) and I thought back to how I like to hike with as much gear as is practical so I know how to use it and realized that this was exactly the opposite of what I should be doing. Regardless if I realized it or not I was replacing equipment with skill. I should have been purposely taking only select items so I could practice doing without the luxury items (which, even if I couldn't admit it, is what they were).

Now I worry that I've caught the ultralight virus bug and that I really am going to be running around in the woods with very little equipment...taking things too far as it were. Concerned that when I get home I'm going to toss everything that won't fit in an 11 oz. backpack into the closet never to be seen again.

I've lost the fine balances I'd convinced myself I had!

Dave,

Don't worry, this is very normal. I guess that lot (most) of people get this after spending (to ) much time around here and getting more stuff and skills. I've had the exact same thing happening to me more then once...

My advise would be to calm down, chill for a couple of days, and then re-evaluate every kit you have and every situation what you would like to make your kit for.

Then just lay all your gear on the floor and think about every item and how it would help you to survive your scenarios. Don't be a pack-rat, but don't be a ultralighter either. Be reasonable for yourself.

Also, when in doubt: post it on ETS!

And of course...good luck!

From a relatively uninformed point-of-view, I offer the following: It sounds like in your quest to "cover all the bases" you have built a mighty fine 72-96 hour BOB. Which is great! Now, you should feel no shame in this. You were only doing what is natural. As a self-proclaimed gear junkie you have taken the first step towards recovery (readjustment). You realized and admitted what most others are probably afraid to personally admit. I am glad you posted this entry because it will allow me to re-examine my approach.

As a side note: I did read on ultralightbacking.com (or something like that) that a guy worked his pack to under 12 pounds for long hikes. Not sure how effective it is in the survival arena.

Group therapy is fun....

These days if you have the money, you can go very light. You can now backpack comfortably for a week with 10 Kg. On my wilderness survival challenge this summer we are taking about 5 kg for 5 days and I think we will live well (less the sleeping bags we do not have). Going Ultralight just costs money. Good gear that last may be heavier but cost less. Selection for the situation is far more important than weight.

I'd rather spend the money on more of your courses Bruce. That survival challenge sounds like fun!

Unfortunately a stolen car, a smashed up jeep, and Christmas has lowered the priority for such things financially.

Don't worry Jim. I'll carefully document my insanity for all to judge...I mean learn from

It seems to me from watching Survivor Man and Man vs. Wild that not only are you dealing with planned adventures to some extent, by two guys who stay within their skills. Les looked pretty freaked out in the Amazon, and I think it was so because he was somewhat out of his element. Same thing with Costa Rica. You see him with his axe in the Canadian woods, and he seems much more at ease and adept at dealing with what faces him.

I also think it's great to develop the skills to survive with nothing but your clothes and a big knife, but it is also not the way you want to live if you have to survive. If it comes down to surviving then you will want to do it with as much comfort as possible. Having gear and stores available makes it more comfortable.

Yes, it seems we get gadget oriented quickly when thinking ahead and how to solve a problem we might imagine in a given scenario, but more likely we will be put into a situation where we may not have the most ideal inventory with which to work. Then it is more a matter of figuring out how to make do with what we have at hand.

That is the dichotomy of thinking survival. Pre-emptive preparation is always apt to focus more towards unlimited gear selection. Once you are in it, though, the opportunities for accessorizing evaporate, and so the mind must focus on getting the task done.

If we can train ourselves into pre-emptively thinking about how to get through a given scenario using only what we might have on us day to day or what is readily available in the environment we might find ourselves, then we become less gadget dependent and better problem-solvers.

Somewhere in there is a happy balance. Survival zen can be achieved.

Hey Hacksaw,

I also think this is a natural pendulum swing for all of us. One blog post from Pablo a while back inspired me to start making lists of my gear and then on the last day take inventory what was used and what was not used. Then better decisions could be made in the future on priorities of gear to carry for that type of trip.

Since you have so much gear experience perhaps it is time to set some time aside to develop more survival skills to maintain that balance. Perhaps taking a primitive skills course following the ol' Mors Kochanski philosophy of "The more you know, the less you carry" would also help in deciding what is essential.

If you can't budget in a full blown primitive skills course (neither can I frankly) check out a few primitive skills books from your local library and take a local wilderness first aid course and/or a few Red Cross training classes. In my experience these are fairly affordable introductions to skill building and when practiced have been more empowering than any shiny piece of gear I own. Every time I want to buy a new piece of gear to replace an heavier older version I put that money aside for a future class. I realized I was starting to compensate for my lack of skill and experience with more gear. Since I own the "essential tools" my brain needs some upgrading before anything else. The skilled brain is the ultimate back-up tool for improvising a solution to any set-back (e.g. lost or stolen backpack containing most of your gear).

Good luck Hacksaw.! Your sincere candor on topics and willingness to provide examples improves the usefulness of this forum dramatically!

Cheers,
Logan.

Well said Benjammin!

Logan,

Primitive skills are something I'd considered silly but last night I was thinking about them again. These are skills that I'd almost never use except in a survival situation but the more I think about it, that's all the more reason to learn these things and practice them

I own several survival books that touch on this topic (including the infamous Bushcraft book by Mr. Kochanski)...I've always passed through these sections pretty quickly.

Wilderness first aid is on my to-do list but I'm waiting for my SAR group to run it instead of my paying for it. Unfortunately it's not required training in Alberta for SAR volunteers so I might have to wait a little while.

It's been a slow day at work today and I've been thinking about how I can solve the problem while keeping (and using) all of the gear (even if it's not all at once). Over the weekend I'm going to take Jim's advice and spread everything out (I've done this before with some success...until the DW makes me pack it up anyhow hehehe). I have a few ideas and over the weekend I think I'll have time to explore them...maybe even run out into the woods to test them.

Thanks for the encouraging words folks. I have a feeling there will be some really positive results come from this moment of doubt.

Hacksaw my friend; I think we have all been here a few times.
This is only my opinion and not meant as criticism in any way, but the only way to fully be comfortable with what you carry is to get out there more in the field and learn the hard way. I spend a lot of time in the field, sometimes because I want to, sometimes because the Army makes me. I always carry a special note book with me EVERY time I hit the field either on my own or with the Military called my “lessons learned” note book. Every time I find a better/ easier more efficient way of doing things or an item of gear I wished I had taken or wished I left behind I write it down and then transfer it to a file on my computer when I gets home. By doing this I am 95 % comfortable with the balance between what I need to have and what is nice to have. Every single time I go out I learn something new about what works and what doesn’t with my gear. The other 5 % I have spoken of is my realization that I will never be 100% happy with all my gear all the time as every new item that gets put on the shelf in stores has the potential of replacing something that I am carrying now, making me think there is something new I need to buy and to test (I no longer fight this force, instead I accept it ) I know living in a condo downtown doesn’t allow you the same opportunities as some people to test your gear as much as you would like before getting into the field but you will most likely drive yourself crazy packing/repacking your gear until you can test it outside more. The first time I headed to the field in Alberta this time of year just after being posted here in 2000 and forgot to bring Vaseline to prevent my boot laces from freezing together and my hands from chapping is a mistake I will never make again. It is also an experience that I could never have learned until I got out there and found out how painful chapped, cracked hands are after a week in -30 weather trying to untie boot laces. Now one of my winter survival items is a small squeeze tube of Vaseline. I also learned the hard way to dump my camelbak because there is no way this time of year to prevent it from freezing. The bottom line is that the more you get out and use your gear, the easier it will become to decide what is needed or just nice to have and what to add or take from your gear to achieve that (ALMOST) perfect balance.

P.S. Although some of these primitive skills/survival skills courses appear to be a big benefit, The most valuable lessons you can learn will be from the things you experience on your own. Be it sleeping on your balcony to test a new sleep system like you did or stomping around a backyard practicing how to light a fire in the rain the best teacher you will have will be yourself. Don’t let a lot of these so called experts fool you. I just came off a 4 day survival skills course a few months ago with the Military and was embarrassed by how little the instructor actually knew. As an example, I started practicing with sparking tools by lighting my fireplace at home, and then I progressed to lighting small controlled fires in my back yard with natural tinder in all sorts of weather. Once I was comfortable with that I took it hunting and continued playing with the skills there. I didn’t need to spend big money for some self proclaimed survival expert to teach me the same thing. Don’t sell yourself short, you will be amazed at what you can learn all on your own.