I've got a better one for you-

Santa's workshop and other facilities are believed to be located at the North Pole. This information became widespread in the late Victorian era, but the facilitates may have been online earlier as the location was initially secure due to inaccessibility. There are no indications that the facility was relocated after it's location was disclosed.

In 1958, Superman constructed his Fortress of Solitude at the North Pole by radically altering the ice pack, the exact methods are unknown. From published photographs, there are no other signs of habitation in the area. From this data, it can be assumed that Santa's workshop, if not previously relocated, was destroyed by Superman in 1958 or earlier. The fate of Santa, his employees and their operation is unknown at this time.

Cross reference- since the early 1960s, young children have decided that Santa does not exist at increasingly earlier ages. During the same period of time, Superman has become year round cultural icon even in regions were Christmas has not been observed. This trend supports the possibility that Superman either rendered the Jolly Old Elf homeless or took actions that even if not intentionally led directly to the death of Santa and his Elves.

It is possible that if Santa escaped this cataclysm, that he made it to land. Assuming he was not shot down by Soviet or NATO fighter patrols, as he has not been spotted in a NATO country with a new shop, it can only be assumed that if he survived, he landed in the USSR. If he had not been found guilty of various crimes against the peasants and workers and sent to the Gulag or liquidated, he would have been absorbed into the Soviet intelligence apparatus. "He knows what you are thinking, he knows when you're awake." He would have brought with him low-observability aircraft capable of high speed and payload. And he already wore a red suit.

I'll let you decide what happened to Santa- yet another victim of Superman's blundering overaggression, a homeless refugee, or a Commie spy?

Yes, I've been eating sugar.

Actually,,,, Santa relocated his facilities and cadre to the Super, Super, Ultra Top Secret Alien base under the Anarctic snowbank/glacier. He rents the space from the Zeta Grey's in conjunction and in collusion with the Triumvirate forces of the US, UK, and France.

This is why sightings of the Grand Old Elf have been inaccurate by 180 degrees since about 1958!

Maybe Santa is Superman and the whole thing is a red herring.

I disagree with both Ors and Ironraven. Santa is obviously a singular being having the ability to go into a superpositioning state as described in the Copenhagen interpetation of quantum mechanics. His wave function would cover all the locations of children in the world. He doesn't have to worry about collapsing into a settled state because he can't be observed: children fall asleep before he arrives, adults don't believe he exsists and so are blind to him. The "Santa-blindness" of adults extends to the point that they believe THEY were the ones who bought/wrapped/placed the presents under the tree, not Santa.

The ability to go into quantum superpostion wave function removes all the difficulties of high-speed travel, too-small chimneys, a gift bag bigger on the inside than outside, raindeer poop, etc...

It makes absolutely perfect sense.

Especially if you're holding a grudge against a cat.

-Blast

Anyone ever think that maybe Santa, and Superman, might be living with Elvis???

What did my last post state????? ANARCTICA !!!!!!

They are all down there reeling, and a rocking, rolling til the break of dawn (translation: partying for 6 months straight).

"...partying for 6 months straight..."

Sounds like my kind of place!!!

Took the words right out of my mouth.


BTW Who are all these late night girls on the TV that want me to call them?

"...Who are all these late night girls on the TV that want me to call them..."

They are the women you momma warned you about...

Good to see I'm not the only one with too much sugar tonight. :P