First off, learn the difference between being assertive and being arrogant.

Master that, and the rest just comes from experience.

(ben, I was not directing this post at you, but at the original OP. )

No worries, and it's not the first time I might've been referred to as arrogant. I am definitely intimidating, especially at meetings. People say I have the demeanor of Darth Vader unless I make a conscious effort to be overly sedate.

At 6'5" and 270 lbs, I can see where they might get that idea. Did I also mention I have a booming Bass voice as well?

What really gets them is when I start making sounds like I am breathing through a mask. LOL