Anti survival trip

I'm going kayaking/camping this weekend with my friends. Originally it was supposed to be me and my good friend whos boyfriend really hates woods. Fair enough since I saw her in action during few storms ( and how she build a shelter out of tarp) so I'm confident in her skills. But now she is bringing 6 of her friends <img src="/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> and they are all girls. Well I'm not complaining or anything (evil smile) but it will be a good experience for me since I was already asked in emails how far away bathrooms are from the campsite, about hot water, showers, etc etc... I answered every question honestly (no bathrooms, showers, stores, electricity) so they know what they are getting into but it is going to be fun. Also all of them have brand new tents, bags, water purifiers, flashlights and survival kits. I told them I be their butler and a cook. One of them is bringing a potential girlfriend (hotdog) for my dog (lab)... This is going to be fun. The pile of gear they have looks like we are planing a trip to Mt Everest. I chose 20 mile route which is very easy but if one of them can't hack it I can pull 2 or 3 kayaks behind mine with ease.

I will be leaving on friday.

Any tips or pointers?

Matt

<img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> AWWWWW man and you didn't even invite us along...Oh well have fun and enjoy. Chances are those that really need the showers etc. may punt and it will be you and a couple of them. <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Polak187:

Bring oxygen for yourself in the event of excess hoties as hyperventilation is not good.

Bountyhunter <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I don't think this will turn into a Hollywood slasherfilm, but try to casually pass on a few basic rules for emergencies. Are they all equipped with a whistle? Are you filing an itinery with someone? They aren't ready, and probably won't absorb much of our mindset. But slip in a few basic thoughts in case of mishap.

Reason I didn't invite you guys over because you would be cramping my style with all your war stories and skills. I'm just a greenhorn and you be bragging about your survival adventures and smootch all the ladies. I will be sweating me self to start a fire and one of you cowboys just flicks his fingers and flames will shoot up. Or I be trying to put a bandaid on the scrape and you just walk into a bushes and walk out with a bunch of herbs and remedies that make holy grail water look weak. We run out of water and I be going back and forth between the river and a camp and one of you fine gents strikes the ground with the heel of your boot and not only get water but also discover oil. No no no thank you very much.

<img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Matt

Yes. I have trip plan filled with people who rent the kayaks to them as well as the ranger office. They all have PFDs and a whistle. I checked rapids ahead and water is all flat. I have my good friend up front with a radio since she is a loner and I close the pack and don't let anyone fall behind. Before the trip they all sleep over in my apartment so besides the regular lecture I'm trying to decide if we are going to watch "Friday teh 13th" or "Deliverance". Plus they are getting safety speech from my friend Mike who runs the kayak rental place.

Matt

To quote John Belushi as Bluto Blutarsky in "Animal House":

"My advice is to begin drinking heavily."

Well my nick in college was Jenny Blutarsky... Jenny because I had crush on Jenny Gump and Blutarsky becasue all my friends figured out "sky" at the end of your name automaticaly means you are polish.

Matt

Polak187:

"Deliverance" would probably be better as there are no women in danger of being slashed by nutso men, just rough water to contend with. The scene with Burt Reynolds leg bone sticking out is very nice.

Bountyhunter

Show "The Edge" I think they will want to stick pretty close to you after seeing that movie. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Pete

Tell them that Kevin Bacon has always been a role model for you then show them White Water Summer <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

eodman:

We used to have a local sun worshiper here in Milwaukee named Dick Bacon, who won a few body building titles. His pick up line used to be "Hi, my names Dick Bacon, do you want a strip"? Colorful fella who used to lie on Bradford beach in midwinter with cardboard and foil reflectors around him in order to maintain his natural tan. He died recently, but it was not from skin cancer. He was just a simple blue collar brewery worker who loved sunbathing almost as much as George Hamilton, who I see is working as a pitchman on TV again. I hate men like him who grow old and still look so good.

Oh well, at least I still have all my marbles, but I can't seem to remember where I put them.

Bountyhunter

Have a great week-end, and don't forget the field expedient water carriers. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Troy

Matt:

Now see here, it would not be like that at all. No sir *shaking head to the affirmative* Not from us it wouldn't.

Really though there are a few things I have learned when dealing with inexperienced ladies in the woods.

1. pack extra toilet paper, truly a necessary item.
2. a small bottle of lotion will go a long way since "new paddlers" will be in your midst. to some women, this shows you care.
3. extra tampons
4. extra tylenol or ibuprofen in the FAK
5. if you have room consider a bottle of no-rinse shampoo, especially for the ladies who wanted the hot shower.
6. make sure you have a corkscrew in your EDC. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

After your little prepardness speech and provided you haven't scared any of them off...Show them your EDC, but be sure to include a couple of Q-Tips as well. <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

"Aren't you one of those guys who takes a couple of Q-Tips and SAK then builds a shopping mall?" Anne Heche to Harrison Ford in 6 Days, 7 nights. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Enjoy

Stargazer

definitly bring extra toilet supplies for the girls.
and bug reppellent,some avon skin so soft should make them happy.

one question is do they know what kind of "bathroom" they will be using?

ex: a hole in the ground, portapotty, or those 5 gal buckets with a toilet seat lid etc?

maybe pack a few sleeping pads for under the bags in your tent incase theirs is too uncomfortable hehe.

Matt

Most importantly, remember that the condoms in your PSK are for water storage.

Matt

Have a safe and fun trip. I am off for a 5 day excursion to Upper Wisconsin.

Take a camera, & post the pictures!!! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I second the advice about extra toiletries.

Be safe & have a good time.

David

Baby wipes should go over well.

Wow. That was some experience. It tested my skills, patience, culinary talents and physical strength.

Few things I've learned this weekend:
- there is no amount of headache medicine I could have taken so it would be enough (for the girls)
- no matter how many times I explained about keeping your stuff dry and double bagging your packs most of the people still got their personal belongings wet
-flashlights are cases for holding dead batteries
-camp mats are not essential piece of equipment if you have a top of the line sleeping bag
-good food will change miserable into jolly
-never ever use girls’ sunscreen lotion. For some reason my good old fashion SPF45 that had consistency of sour cream and costs $3 a bottle works 10 times better than SPF60 from major designer for $20 a bottle. But it is fun applying either one.
-3 rolls of toilet paper was a comfortable amount plus 2 rolls of paper towels.
-2 branches is enough fire wood for all night
-Flirt will get you much further with the rangers than a solid case. How come I never got a ride in their motor boat?
-Bottled water was used for everything from washing, to rinsing, to cleaning, drinking and squirting… That’s a lot of water. For some reason everyone assumed we have bottomless supply of water.


Few survival things that I've learned:
- Air Force fire starter from CountyComm works like a charm. I let the fire die out 4 times and used different methods of starting it.
-Since I gave my sleeping bag and warm clothes to the girls I needed to keep me self warm at night. I've constructed a sleeping bag from rain fly and fleece liner. It was perfect.
-Food wise I experimented with new stuff that usually don't gets cook over the camp fire but made some potato chips with onion and pepper side and some good home fries for bfast.
-Even I got surprised when one of the girls took out a nice custom folder but she couldn’t fold it back in.

Well everyone had a time of their life. It was fun and after few safety rules everything went smooth. It was a nice trip and everyone wants to do it again next week. Well I don’t think I’m ready for it yet. I was pulling triple shifts with cooking and keeping everything organized.

Hourra !!

When reading your first post, I was somewhat preoccupied ....
I was wondering if you would come back well and alive !! <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

It seems you made it !

Congratulations !!
and thanks for the "lessons learned" .. might come handy someday ...

Excellent story! Fantastic. I loved it. You deserve a star in your crown just for doing what you did.

fun applying sun screen, eh!!
good for you!

Nothing quite matches the "hands on" method.