APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST

Posted by: Chris Kavanaugh

APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/26/03 06:52 AM

I am announcing the first annual April Fool's Day contest. Everyone is invited to submit one totally rediculous question, survival idea or tool. IE, can the water in a compass be consumed in an emergency, ALTOID TIN mint recipes, field testing the EBAY rare, ultimate, vietnam era, made in China commando survival knife with 323 FREE additional survival items in the hollow tube etc. Winner( s) to receive the satisfaction of those other sites actually debating the merits of these posts <img src="images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: frenchy

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/26/03 08:02 PM

Well, I guess this idea is an old, but sure value for the contest and perfectly designed to fit ourAltoid tin boxes : dehydrated water ..... <img src="images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />, a must for every one on this forum ; takes literally no place in the PSK !!!
I'll try later on to post a link to an online source..... <img src="images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Regards.
Alain
Posted by: Comanche7

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/26/03 11:13 PM

Dang it! Dehydrated water Frenchy beat me to it! <img src="images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

This item was recently discussed around the dinner table one night when my son & I were busily "repacking" our PSK'S .["PLAYING IS MORE LIKE IT", according to a well placed local source <img src="images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />]

Hmmm, I gonna see what I can come up with.

Comanche7
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 03:28 AM

I'll give it a shot.
Stock your PSK with a small hand full of green peas. If you come to a stream or lake, just sprinkle the peas on the shore near the water. When a fish comes out to take a pea, GRAB 'IM... <img src="images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 04:47 AM

How about proposing an initiation for potential forum users.
Take a bag of marbles and put them in your mouth, every time you enter forum you spit one out.
You become a member when you've lost all your marbles.
Posted by: Chris Kavanaugh

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 04:57 AM

Now that is cruel. Two wrongs do not make a right. However, 3 lefts do <img src="images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 05:26 AM

hmm..okay, how about a recipe for whistle peas?

step one : crack open 40 or 50 whistles...
Posted by: Tjin

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 04:17 PM

well can you drink the water from your compass ? <img src="images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> no serious can you ?

hmm.... can you "walk" over a stream with blown up condooms duct taped under shoes, without getting wet ? <img src="images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 06:31 PM

Can I use a condom as my escape hood?
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 07:07 PM

Can I use parachute cord to safely bail out of a light aircraft that's going down?

Why aren't airlines required to put soft mulch around the bottom of the escape slide?

Ed
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 07:31 PM

Speaking of airplanes and escape systems: Polish Air Force just approved and is installing ejection seats for their... helicopters. Also solar powered flashlights became a standard part of pilots survival gear <img src="images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 08:04 PM

well, perhaps you can't walk with inflated condoms, perhaps you can. In anycase there are those who are solving the problem of expedient walking on water. Looks like styrofoam, venetian blinds and duct-tape are the required equippment.

Walk on Water
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 08:55 PM

Did you hear about the horrific air disaster in Poland? A Cessna went down in a cemetary. So far they've recovered 487 bodies. <img src="images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: Virginian

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 09:33 PM

As part of the testing for my business, I've smashed, thrown, and torn apart numerous types of compasses and none were filled with water. There may be some out there, but the ones I've destroyed have an oily liquid that smells a lot like kerosene in them.

I wouldn't recommend drinking the stuff, but you may be able to tear enough of them apart (5,000 or so), in order to refuel your vehicle. You never know... you might run out of fuel near a compass factory!

George
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 11:05 PM

Can't remember what show it was on t.v., but there actually is a helicopter with ejection seats. Explosives blow the rotors first and then the seats eject.
Discovery channel or something.
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/27/03 11:38 PM

Yes, that plane went down right next to my house so my dad helped local PD burry the survivors...

Matt
Posted by: corpsman

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 03:58 AM

But two Wrights make an airplane...
Posted by: Tjin

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 01:14 PM

i think it is the russian made KA-50 ( single seater ) and the KA-52 ( the twin seater ) attack helicopters....
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 01:25 PM

They had a Hollywod version of that in 007 Goldeneye...

Matt
Posted by: Tjin

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 01:35 PM

actually that was a german tiger hellicopter... with's has no injection seats... just the 007 one...
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 01:40 PM

You got beef with 007? He is my hero. <img src="images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 05:21 PM

Mine too.

He has the gadgets
The women (i';ve just been thumped by my wife)
The cars
The charisma - i cfome close-i'm pefecting it (wife says-my husbands a comedian you know!)

mark
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 08:11 PM

Someone told me that the apache also has that. Also, you can get solar powered torches that store the power in the day and use it at night
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 08:21 PM

Yes I think ParamedicPete has one of those flashlights, TAD gear sells them.

Matt
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 08:34 PM

Does a compass made in china only work in china?
Cause it don't work here.
Does a compass in Australia only turn counter-clockwise?
Are compasses in Europe graduated in metric incriments?
Do compasses in Dixie point south?
I hear that compasses in Wahington, D.C. point more to the left, or is it right?
Does anyone have a snipe trap in their kit?
If you take an altoid mint and put it in a PSK "water condom", then place on ground, a snipe will get it's head stuck trying to get the mint. Cinnamon seems to work good.
Try keeping a pair of panty hose in your PSK, if you get lost in the wild, go ahead and put them on, no one will know.
I wanted to keep a can of beans in my kit, but the juice seeped out of the altoid tin.
Keep an extra pair of underwear in your kit, cause if you crash your plane, first you say it, then you do it!!!
A battery operated blender might not be a bad idea. Great for those emergency margaritas.
Posted by: M_a_x

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 09:19 PM

AFAIK you´re right. Those helicopter are a quite unusual design. They don´t have tail rotors.
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 10:12 PM

Survival uses for silk stockings:

Yes those garments worn by women have a great many survival uses. In fact nylon tights (pantyhose?) can also be used and may be better in some circumstances, although they're not such a joy to wear <img src="images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

Ok so the first thing is that you have to wear the things, in fact you have to wear them throughout your whole wilderness trip, if your trip is only going to be a few days you may have to pre-wear them.

Water filter: Your well worn stockings will not only filter out large particulates but are also biologically active. Basically the bacteria/fungi in your sweaty silk will react with any nasties in the water rendering even the muckiest water drinkable. Clearly those parts of the stockings which are close to the sweatiest parts of the body will be the most useful. Stockings may only provide you with the two feet, tights (pantyhose) will also provide you with the extremely effective crotch area.

Bait: Small pieces of the silk will act as excellent bait, mainly because of the pheremones which will atrract a great many fish and small mammals. A words of warning though that prolonged wear will provide enough pheremones which might attract larger game, like Grizzlies.

Fire starting: An added advantage of using tights as opposed to stockings is that material from the crotch area provides a highly effective tinder which will produce great heat from even the smallest spark. The wearer will need to be careful during thunderstorms, the tendency to cower to the ground with the backside pointed skywards should be avoided.

Other board members are welcome to suggest other uses for these fantastic survival garments.

Justin
Posted by: Polak187

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/28/03 10:26 PM

When belt (water pump or cooling fan) in your car breaks down you can use the stocking to replace it.

Pull the over your head either as a bug net or face mask to rob a liquor store.

Present them as a gift to unfriendly Amazon women tribe that you stumbled upon. Make sure you complement them on looks after stockings are in place.

After milking the cow and beating the milt use stockings to fish out small pieces of cheese. When you have enough, tie the open end, squeeze water out and smoke it or let it sit to mature.

Enter local beauty contest, win and for a prize, buy a ticket to go home.

Make a butterfly or fish net.

Matt
Posted by: WOFT

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/29/03 04:31 PM

A nice additional tool for 4 X 4 enthusiasts is a glass hammer...
And to pass the time and fight that psychological boredom associated with survival situations, an inflatable dart board isn't a heavy item to slip into your back pocket.
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/29/03 04:53 PM

Good idea. A pilot or boater could save even more weight by using a map marker to draw the dart board right on the liferaft itself <img src="images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Ed
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: APRIL FOOLS DAY CONTEST - 03/29/03 07:36 PM

Wrong head! <img src="images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />