Blast thought he had a good idea.

Posted by: Blast

Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/28/10 10:39 PM

This morning I dug up approximately thirty pounds of greenbriar tubers...all from the same plant.

GreenbriarTuber2 by merriwether, on Flickr

I've been wanting to try preparing them as the Native Americana's did, both slow-roasting and starch removal. The N.A.'s would bury them under a large fire and bake them for three days. At this point the starch was converted to sugars which they would then chew and suck off the fibrous tuber body. I didn't have enough wood for a 3-day bonfire, but I did have a microwave...

Greenbriar tubers are very much like very fibrous potatoes and so I figured I treat it like I was baking a really big potato in the microwave. Considering the size of the tuber, 15 minutes at full power seemed like a reasonable setting. Everything seemed to be going well until around minute 12.

WHOOMP!! Suddenly the greenbriar burst into huge, leaping flames. I reacted in a split second, diving for my camera to take pictures of the burning microwave, then that annoy "reason" part of the brain kicked in and made me grab the fire extinguisher instead. A quick blast of yellow powder and the fire was out.

Of course the kitchen was filled with thick smoke. Luckily the DW and DDs weren't home so I was able to open all the doors and windows...and wash down the whole kitchen.

Surprisingly, burning greenbriar tuber smells a lot like caramel plus dark roast coffee.

When DW got home her face lite up as she walked in the door. "Someone's been cooking something yummmy! Is there any left for us?" she said and raced to the kitchen...and saw the microwave. It cleaned up pretty well but I think some of the scorch marks will be permanent. After giving her the whole story she just shook her head and sighed, "We don't have these problems when you're at work."

This started out about the size of a nice acorn squash.

Burned by merriwether, on Flickr

-Blast, who still has six more days of vacation
Posted by: hikermor

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/28/10 11:34 PM

Well, now you know that eleven minutes in the microwave is a more suitable time. Ah, the price of progress.....
Posted by: Eric

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/28/10 11:38 PM

Moderation in all things, except Blast's cooking!!! Just remember the food is done when the smoke alarm sounds (at least that is what I tell my wife).

- Eric
Posted by: hercdoc

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 12:14 AM

I really enjoy learning from other folks mistakes.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 12:36 AM

Blast, please consider an autopsy of the root. Is it completely carbonized? Is there a gooey, yummy center? Please relay to us both the smell and taste of several sections - for scientific reasons of course.

Edit: I understand table saws are approved tools for tough autopsies.
Posted by: Blast

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 01:42 AM

Originally Posted By: dweste
Blast, please consider an autopsy of the root. Is it completely carbonized? Is there a gooey, yummy center? Please relay to us both the smell and taste of several sections - for scientific reasons of course.

Edit: I understand table saws are approved tools for tough autopsies.


It was carbon almost all the way through, though the center was still charred woody/fibrous material. It had a very pleasant smell kind of like a mixture of caramel and dark roasted coffee. My shirt still holds that smell. I'm wondering if there'd be a market for greenbriar incense. smile

The taste was charcoalish with hints of earthiness, I don't see a market for that except for people looking for a new experience with their smoker. Hmmm, note to self: send some greenbriar tubers to dad.

The remains have been added to the compost bin from which they may someday return to my plate.

-Blast, who plans on harvesting some bamboo tomorrow if the weather is good. DW already has the bandages ready.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 02:34 AM

You the man!
Posted by: Hikin_Jim

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 06:06 AM

The title of this thread said it all. lol

HJ
Posted by: Richlacal

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 06:25 AM

Maybe you could create an Esscence of sorts,for Otherwise Petro-Stinky Charcoal!Set up a Roadside Stand:Blast's,Home of The Original Texas Caramel Coffee Burgers,Y'all Hungry Yet?:)
Posted by: CANOEDOGS

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 04:27 PM

Blast..don't give up on this!!..i had a look at Wikipedia and Greenbrier,also know as smilax,has dozens of uses.
Posted by: dougwalkabout

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 04:53 PM

Originally Posted By: Blast
After giving her the whole story she just shook her head and sighed, "We don't have these problems when you're at work."


That sounds eerily familiar. grin

Consider this: that blackened tuber isn't waste, it's biochar. The potato-left-in-the-microwave scenario has led some to speculate about giant microwave ovens zapping agricultural waste into carbon, enhancing soil fertility and sequestering atmospheric carbon.

So what we're really looking at is kitchen-sink geoengineering, a la Blast. cool
Posted by: Mark_R

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 06:01 PM

I had a roommate who did the same thing with chestnuts in a microwave. Did not smell anywhere near as nice as your flambéed tubers. Never leave anyone unattended who is more familiar with Homer (The Odyssey) than with Home Depot.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Blast thought he had a good idea. - 12/29/10 06:55 PM

As a friend keeps reminding me, you gotta be smarter than the equipment.