Best thing to do for a friend

Posted by: dweste

Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 06:23 PM

Will be homeless tomorrow. Everything "okay" except:

No one wants the cat. Not friends, not family, not vets, not humane society. Been posting and asking for weeks.

Raised cat from tiny kitten. Ten year old fixed Bengal male. Good times, bad times, his and mine, etc. Seem to love the little guy.

Taking to shelter = letting strangers kill him.

Abandon him?

Put him down?

What?

Closest thing I have to a kid. Yeah, I know he's just an animal.
Posted by: Russ

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 06:32 PM

That's rough, nobody? Any way to just stash him at a boarding facility for a while until the boat is ready?

Times like this let you know who your friends are.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 06:48 PM

Boat deal will be delayed, might fall through. I am going to board him until the money runs out; afraid I am just delaying the inevitable - trying to get some perspective. Don't blame friends- much- they have good reasons.
Posted by: Paragon

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 08:19 PM

I'll be the first to admit to having never been a cat person so my ideas may apply more to dogs, but could he not join you as you embark on the start of your new life?

In lieu of this, have you spoken with any of the local assisted living centers, nursing homes, or drug rehab halfway houses?

Animals can be very therapeutic, and I would think that perhaps a local center would consider adopting him to cheer up the residents, especially if you explained your situation and could show that all his vaccines and licenses were up to date.

Good luck, Jim
Posted by: OldBaldGuy

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 09:28 PM

If you wanted to drive down to Mariposa, the SPCA there does not put animals down, they keep them 'til they have a home for them. They also maintain a "wish list," if someone wants a small black dog (for example), they go on the list, when one comes in a call is made and fido has a new home. I have seen animals come in and have a new home without even seeing the inside of a cage. Not too long a drive for you. I can give you their phone number if you are interested...
Posted by: Susan

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 10:33 PM

No one could even hold him temporarily (family, friends)?

No-kill shelters in CA: http://www.saveourstrays.com/nokill.htm

Sue
Posted by: Susan

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/15/08 10:45 PM

Bengal Rescue: http://www.bengalrescuenetwork.org/

Sue
Posted by: Art_in_FL

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 01:11 AM

If no one wants the cat a no-kill shelter would be the best choice IMO.

As callous as it sounds, failing that I would put him down myself. Some vigorous play to relax him, a hearty meal, a bit of contented lap sitting for a the final minutes and then a quick twist and a snap of the neck. Followed by a dignified burial and, likely, a stiff drink. It is a tough reality. But it is real.

If a friend or relative was facing such poor options with my final disposition I would like to think they would do the same for me. A quick and painless out is about as good as I could expect.

Taking care of such problems in-house at the hands of a loved one is, I think, the responsible way to go and not so bad. A lot of people think you can just let them go and somehow it will magically 'all work out'. Like a Disney afternoon movie. Mostly it doesn't and they are condemning their pet to long term starvation, misery, loneliness, vicious fights with wild or feral animals for food, and a messy and painful death by getting hit by a car, infection and/or a slow death by disease.

I wouldn't want my pet to suffer like that and I don't like the idea of sticking others with my problems or my companion having to face its final minutes frightened, alone and his final exit handled by a stranger. I wouldn't want my pet to suffer because I lacked the intestinal fortitude to do what has to be done and to do it well.
Posted by: wildman800

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 01:19 AM

I'm sorry I can't keep him for you, but Louisiana is too far to ship him, or else I would hold him for you.

If anybody in Ca is headed east through Lousy-anna, I'll provide a place for him in my home.

I'm sorry I can't do better than that.

Bo
Posted by: OldBaldGuy

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:33 AM

"...a quick twist and a snap of the neck..."

I wouldn't try that. Without going into the gory (and painful) details, I once tried to do battle to the death, hand to hand, with a really mad Siamese. Cat's are tough. I once put down my cat of 19 years with chloroform (hard to get). Didn't work well. If I had to do it again, I would use a .22...
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:37 AM

Originally Posted By: Paragon
could he not join you as you embark on the start of your new life?

In lieu of this, have you spoken with any of the local assisted living centers, nursing homes, or drug rehab halfway houses?




My new life does not yet have space or permission for a pet. I'm working on it.

The therapeutic cat idea is a good one. Phone calls tomorrow.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:38 AM

Originally Posted By: BigDaddyTX
Find a local no-kill shelter and make a big donation. Give them $100 to take him, and they'll do it, they always need the money. .


I tried that in the towns for about 75 miles around. No go. Too many cats already.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:39 AM

Originally Posted By: OldBaldGuy
If you wanted to drive down to Mariposa, the SPCA there does not put animals down, they keep them 'til they have a home for them. They also maintain a "wish list," if someone wants a small black dog (for example), they go on the list, when one comes in a call is made and fido has a new home. I have seen animals come in and have a new home without even seeing the inside of a cage. Not too long a drive for you. I can give you their phone number if you are interested...


Phone number please. It is a long way to go, but I will find a way if that works.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:41 AM

Thanks, Sue. I'm on it.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:45 AM

Originally Posted By: Art_in_FL
I wouldn't want my pet to suffer like that and I don't like the idea of sticking others with my problems or my companion having to face its final minutes frightened, alone and his final exit handled by a stranger. I wouldn't want my pet to suffer because I lacked the intestinal fortitude to do what has to be done and to do it well.


Agreed. Hoping it will not come to that. No way will I let him die alone or with strangers if that is the only choice. Not to that point yet. Still hoping and fighting for an alternative.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:49 AM

Originally Posted By: wildman800
If anybody in Ca is headed east through Lousy-anna, I'll provide a place for him in my home.

I'm sorry I can't do better than that.

Bo


The offer is greatly appreciated. Doing what you can do is always enough, though it often feels like you are coming up short. You did good. Thanks.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:55 AM

[quote=OldBaldGuy I would use a .22... [/quote]

Working on a vet to either take him, get him adopted, or help me handle the final alternative if it comes to that. If he goes that way it will be quietly with me cuddling him, telling him what a great cat he is ... and crying my eyes out.

Not there yet, hopefully won't have to get even close.

You guys have given me some new ideas and hope.

He's using the special "let me in" password, so I have to go. Glad he cannot know what is running through my mind.

Geez, I feel miserable about this.
Posted by: Russ

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 10:09 AM

My cat was one of those that was either turned out or just didn't like his living arrangements. I found him (or he found me) as a stray. A can of tuna and we were cordial. Trip to the vet for a check-up, shots and a bath, and the adoption was complete. He passed in 2001, eight years later.

I'd have picked up dweste's friend while passing through Sacramento/Stockton last week, but my living arrangements won't allow it (roommate hates cats). Hope things work out.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 10:20 AM

I'll keep you posted on my specific situation.

I would like to think this topic has some worth as a general preparedness / survival matter.

What would you do if faced with choosing between keeping pets safe, fed, and watered as opposed moving yourself or family to safety with food and water? How have you prepared to deal with this choice?
Posted by: benjammin

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 11:55 AM

I've had my share of "Ole Yeller" moments. I've learnt where the best place to put the bullet is.

I hope it don't come to that for you. It is rough, but it's our responsibility. Sounds to me like you've got some more options to explore still, so hope for the best. I always believe there are options for such situations.
Posted by: chuuucky

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 01:04 PM

Maybe for my infobank: what is "the best place to put the bullet"(?), if you don't mind sharing. I am a longtime lover of dogs (have two now, an eleven yo Welsh terrier and a six yo Aussie Cattle Dog), and many cats, most of whom became a meal for coyotes. I feel your possible "technical" information should be viewed as humane knowledge. Thanks, Benjammin, for your response.
Posted by: benjammin

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 01:23 PM

Well, due to the graphic nature of the subject matter, and the moderator's wish not to offend the gen pub, let's just say theirs an instant off switch about an inch behind the ear. Even that may be a bit much, but I've only ever used it out of compassion and love.

If anyone needs more details, I will PM.
Posted by: Paragon

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 02:38 PM

Originally Posted By: Art_in_FL
As callous as it sounds, failing that I would put him down myself. Some vigorous play to relax him, a hearty meal, a bit of contented lap sitting for a the final minutes and then a quick twist and a snap of the neck. Followed by a dignified burial and, likely, a stiff drink. It is a tough reality. But it is real.

I too would look towards a .22 before considering this route. In an unarmed survival situation I believe that I could accomplish this humanely with a snared rabbit, but never with a pet. The risk of not being successful on the first attempt and causing pain to an animal that loved me unconditionally is not something I'd be willing to risk.

I had to put down two little doggies in my life, and both were in my lap with me crying my eyes out. Of all the difficult things that I've had to endure throughout my life, putting a suffering pet to sleep ranks at the top of the list.

Jim
Posted by: benjammin

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 03:01 PM

I would not recommend a 22. I use the most powerful handgun load I can manage. This is not a job to do feebly. You want to be thorough and deliberate about it.

The toughest so far was a horse. You'd be surprised how emotionally compelling a very pregnant young woman can be. Not something I care to repeat. Thank God I was only assisting the Vet that time. Brutal memories, but we did the best job she could've asked for.
Posted by: chuuucky

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 03:47 PM

Many thanks, Benjammin. Your information is very useful and may lead to a much more humane, though of course, very necessary but painful future experience.
Posted by: KG2V

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:04 PM

I've got some hot leads - fingers crossed. He might have to be shipped, but I know a couple of use with emergency funds to do the shipping... Everyone keep fingers crossed - there is a phone chain being called around here...

I WOULD take him, excapt that the Woman who is in effect my wife's 'second mom' is in hospice, and we have promised to take in her two cats.
Posted by: nurit

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:26 PM

I'd be happy to contribute some for shipping costs.

Nurit
Posted by: Stu

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 04:49 PM

Originally Posted By: nurit
I'd be happy to contribute some for shipping costs.

Nurit

I'm in for a few $$ to save the kitty.
Posted by: KG2V

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 05:11 PM

I've got a hot leed out in California - the sister of one of the cat folks I know, and we are running downthe phone tree here in the NYC area

Don, if you are reading this, keep an eye on your email
Posted by: Ranter

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 07:02 PM

Originally Posted By: SBRaider
Originally Posted By: nurit
I'd be happy to contribute some for shipping costs.

Nurit

I'm in for a few $$ to save the kitty.


X3. I'm in too.
Posted by: Grouch

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 07:05 PM

Originally Posted By: SBRaider
Originally Posted By: nurit
I'd be happy to contribute some for shipping costs.

Nurit

I'm in for a few $$ to save the kitty.


+1 - I'm in.
Posted by: OldBaldGuy

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/16/08 11:34 PM

Phone is (209) 966-5275.

My wife tells me that they only take "local" critters, so if you want to do this, give me a PM and I will give you our address to use. We will work out a lie that will fly.

She also says that there are now many SPCA's in the north central valley, such as Modesto, that are also doin' this kind of thing, so you might try them, it would save you a few miles of driving...
Posted by: Kris

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/17/08 11:33 AM

Originally Posted By: Grouch
Originally Posted By: SBRaider
Originally Posted By: nurit
I'd be happy to contribute some for shipping costs.

Nurit

I'm in for a few $$ to save the kitty.


+1 - I'm in.


I'm in too for shipping and/or boarding.

If my wife heard this story, she'd be looking to ship it here to Cayman. She has her mom's "save everything" gene. But we have two spca cats and with twins coming next year it's already a full house.

Wish you all the luck.

Kris
Posted by: paramedicpete

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/17/08 12:29 PM

I can also chip in.

Pete
Posted by: OldBaldGuy

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/17/08 02:15 PM

PM sent...
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/18/08 03:43 PM

You guys are the best. I will not need any money right now and I just heard from a client who I thought stiffed me that he had a bad address - so I am getting a check tonight that will keep everything okay for a couple more weeks. Furby cat is safe and happy boarded at the vets now (they know and like him). I have received and responded to several PMs - thanks again. The Mariposa option may be the deal.
Posted by: Grouch

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/18/08 04:16 PM

Good for you and your pet! Keep the faith!
Posted by: KG2V

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/18/08 05:36 PM

Hey, that's great news...

BTW Kitty have a name?
Posted by: nurit

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/18/08 05:41 PM

Glad to hear it!
Posted by: OldBaldGuy

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/18/08 09:00 PM

"...The Mariposa option may be the deal..."

Great! Be sure to call them first, we haven't been in there for at least a year, things may have changed...
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/19/08 08:01 PM

I ran into a friend who has 2 Bengal cats already - and a wolf, etc. I thought he knew what was going on with my cat but it turned out he had no idea. He volunteered that his household could accomodate another cat if the cats got along!

So Saturday Furby cat goes a courtin' I am confident he will charm his way into the human hearts in the household, though I am a bit worried about the resident cats accepting him. He will spend most of the first few days in his cat carrier so the cats can check each other out without anyone being at risk.

Prayers / good thoughts, please.
Posted by: dougwalkabout

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/19/08 11:14 PM

Sending good vibrations from north of the 49th.

Hope this plan comes together.
Posted by: dweste

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/22/08 06:36 PM

All seems well with the transplant.

After a day of playing "invisible cat," there have been several Furby sightings, including seeing him eat.

Thank you all for your support, it meant a lot.
Posted by: nurit

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/23/08 01:12 AM

Dweste, thanks for the update. I know you'll miss him. But this new home you've found for him does seem to offer both safety and interesting friends!
Posted by: Grouch

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/23/08 06:48 AM

I hope that your overall situation can be dealt with as swiftly as finding a good home for your pet. smile
Posted by: KG2V

Re: Best thing to do for a friend - 09/23/08 10:33 AM

Glad you found him a home - now I hope you find YOU a home.