How will Paris survive?

http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2007/12/27/2007-12-27_how_will_paris_hilton_survive-1.html

The question is: Do we want Paris Hilton to survive..

I can't believe I read a gossip column. My eyes are burning.

I understand that to her 5mil is like nothing, but she DOES rake in millions with pub(l)ic apearances, which is likely why she's not already suing grandpa. She'll probably sue to get more of a cut after he's dead. If she really ends up with just that, she'll probably throw a hissy fit that would make a screaming three-year-old want to smack her upside the head.

Give me a break, folks...

If you haven't seen the videos, let me tell you, the girl has some skill sets...

She'll do okay...

I'm right there with ya! I feel dirty.



File this among "...things I'll never understand..."

If all else fails, I am sure she can get a nice cushy job working for the foundation to which all the money is going.

After being forced to watch her in action on "Simple Life" for a solid 5 minutes before I could escape, I would much prefer her to do a stint on "Dirty Jobs". Lower her into the lift station to scrape the walls for a while, I guarantee her attitude would be different when you finally hoisted her back up, only after she was done of course.

Mike Rowe rules!

Following market fads, Paris announced the Paris Locator Beacon, a faux jewel encrusted digital devise in dayglo Paris Pink that will give realtime latitude, of which society has given her an abundance, and longitude of her location. Carried on a Papparazi breakaway spaghetti strap, the unit will be available early February. Asked to demonstrate, Paris shrugged and said" you have to look at it or something, but the point is if you know where I am, you know your own place in society and thats a good thing."

By lying on her back, same way she does now.

"How will Paris survive? "
Does anyone care???
She is a master of the worlds "oldest" profession, at least till her looks go!

No one really cares. After all, if her last name wasn't Hilton, her profession wouldn't be called 'acting'. She's just one more bimbo in a long line of bimbos who disappeared when the first line showed up in their faces.

Yaaaaaawwwwwwn.....

Sue

#1, I don't care.

#2, I don't care.

#3, with her new bolt-ons (aka boob job), I am sure that Playboy or Penthouse will give her a mil or so for a layout, that should help pay her bills for a day or three...

She'll make a new "movie".

She's already made a movie? I can not imagine paying to see her...

Sort of. It went "straight to video", if you know what I mean.....

My hat is off to the Hilton family for their generous gift to charity.

Hopefully the money will get distributed as they describe.

If the will gets challenged by all of the Hilton clan, its the charity (or charities) that will get hurt the most. Not to mention lawyers WILL keep it in the courts for as long as they can and will recieve a good chunk of the 97% of the estate for their efforts.

Its rich fighting with rich when someone 'tries' to go a good deed, and its still the people who need it the most that get screwed. Nothing changes.

she will become bunk mate with one of you guys.

Even if I were to stoop that low, I can't afford to pay her what she thinks she is worth...

You don't have a nickle?? OOPS, you said "what she thinks she is worth", sorry. I read that as what others think she is worth.

Ah, the "Madcap Heiress." If this were a '30s movie, she'd meet some gruff survival expert (say Chris Kavanaugh) and they would be thrown together in a screwball comedy, in which a series of hilarious situations would be caused by humorous contratemps and improbable coincidences. They would start out hating each other, but come to a grudging mutual admiration based upon his rugged individuality and skill in extracting her from danger, and her plucky good humor. Admiration would kindle into love, but in the third reel they would quarrel over some misunderstanding.

The survival expert would storm into her father's Manhattan office demanding recompense. Imagining that he had a fortune hunter on his hands, the father would summon Building Security. As he was being dragged away, the survival expert would yell, "Eighteen dollars and seventeen cents!"

Intrigued, the father would call him back. "Eighteen dollars, you say?"

"And seventeen cents! I have receipts!" the survival expert digs into the cargo pocket in his trail pants and throws a packet of papers onto the father's desk. "Everything I needed to replenish my BOB after your worthless daughter got us into this fix. I'm throwing in the MREs and Bandaids for free! You can send me a check!"

The father, of course, arranges for him to pick up the check where Paris is doing community service for her indecent exposure conviction. They reconcile in an embrace, and the movie ends.

I propose Cary Grant to play Cris, and Jean Harlow for Paris.

Naa, Harlow was too good looking to play Hilton. Having never seen Chris, I can not comment on Grant...