The Best Disclaimer. EVER.

Excerpted From: http://www.nelsonrocks.org/disclaimer.html

"Nature is unpredictable and unsafe. Mountains are dangerous. Many books have been written about these dangers, and there's no way we can list them all here. Read the books.

Nelson Rocks Preserve is covered in steep terrain with loose, slippery and unstable footing. The weather can make matters worse. Sheer drops are everywhere. You may fall, be injured or die. There are hidden holes. You could break your leg. There are wild animals, which may be vicious, poisonous or carriers of dread diseases. These include poisonous snakes and insects. Plants can be poisonous as well. We don't do anything to protect you from any of this. We do not inspect, supervise or maintain the grounds, rocks, cliffs or other features, natural or otherwise.

Real dangers are present even on trails. Trails are not sidewalks. They can be, and are, steep, slippery and dangerous. Trail features made or enhanced by humans, such as steps, walls and railings (if any) can break, collapse, or otherwise fail catastrophically at any time. We don't promise to inspect, supervise or maintain them in any way. They may be negligently constructed or repaired. They are unsafe, period. Live with it or stay away.

Stay on the trails whenever possible. The terrain, in addition to being dangerous, is surprisingly complex. You may get lost. Carry food, water and first aid supplies at all times. "

(much more on the site: http://www.nelsonrocks.org/disclaimer.html )

<img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

It's a little sad that folks need to post such disclaimers, but it truly is hilarious!

That is the best thing I've read in weeks. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Wait a minute. You mean the preserve area is actually dangerous. We're gonna have to shut them down. Can't have a dangerous area...somebody might get hurt.

Umm.... does this mean that I shouldn't take my three toddlers down the trails while I'm wearing high heels and trying to hold onto the half-grown, untrained Mastiff on a leash? <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Sue

Not unless you dye your hair blond as an EDC emergency signalling device. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I saw that high heels part in the little shack during approach to Kilimanjaro... Lady had top of the line light hiking gear (sandals, shorts and sport top) but when their group stopped she changed for high heels and evening dress. When asked if she has any other clothes she said that all she brought were dress clothes. So when she was asked which part of "extreme and fit and dangerous" she didn't understand in the trip description she stated that she thought it was a publicity stunt to get more people by touching their and I quote "sense of adventure".

Wish they would leave it alone and just let Darwin?s theory work its magic!! <img src="/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

I was thinking about this disclaimer while I was washing dishes, and it might be viewed by attorneys the same way as "Beware of Dog" signs, which they say you shouldn't post as a warning -- you should post a "No Tresspassing" sign instead.

In posting a "Beware of Dog" sign, you are admitting in advance that the dog is dangerous, you knew it was dangerous, yet you let it run loose on your own fenced property, knowing it might attack a poor burglar, escaped convict or serial killer, and do them serious damage.

I wonder if it makes a difference if you ORDERED the dog to attack, or if it does it on its own???

Sue

Ah, lawyers.

Is not this a lamentable thing that the skin of an innocent lamb should be made into parchment and that parchment, being scribbled over, should undo a man.

Shakespear, Henry VI

Not only is it the best, it is the most comprehensive. That was well thought through, and I believe it would stand up. The "Beware of Dog" signs protect no one, but this one is so specific and verbose I think it would take a judge or jury just hell-bent on mayhem to not respect it.

Final paragraph before signature line, from the Registration & Release and Agreement NRP climbers are required to sign:

I WANT NRP AND EVERYONE CONNECTED WITH NRP TO HAVE EVERY PROTECTION FROM LIABILITY THE LAW WILL ALLOW, AND THEN SOME. I WON’T SUE THEM AND I DON’T WANT ANYONE ELSE SUING THEM. NO MATTER WHAT. I REALLY, REALLY MEAN THIS. REALLY.

They shouldn't just have them sign it, they should have them WRITE it all out.

In court, their attorney would probably ask them "When you signed this, did you understand what you were signing?"

And the idiot with the high heels, 3 kids and unruly dog that fell off the cliff would respond, "No, I didn't understand it. They just told me to sign it."

Shakespeare was right.

Sue

Somewhat related is this safety advisory. It is for a *toy*:

http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagen...date=2000-11-03

I thought I would resurrect this thread because this is great. Hope you don't mind Martin.

Thanks,

Blitz

This was always one of my favorite "disclaimers"... Not as verbose as the one cited earlier, but, I think it still gets their point across.

First the version you hope to see:





Of course, if it looks like THIS, you're already probably in trouble:




There are a bunch of these on all the trails that lead into the alpine zone in the NH Presidential Range. Fun!

Ya gotta love it!!!

BRILLIANT!!!

-Bill Liptak

I remember looking at those signs at the bottom of Mt Washington, and grinning, and KNOWING they meant it

I have pictures of my parents and I up there in June, in heavy winter jackets (yes we brought them along knowing...)

My wife and I went up there on our Honeymoon - late July (had to be the 19th or 20th) - it was in the low 40s, and of course - windy

Many years ago, a few friends and I had planned on going to MT Washington to do some ice climbing.....we were friends with some people who did it regularly and agreed to take a very small group of us novices. They knew us and our abilities and thought we were ready......I don't remember what year it was but that year there was a bad storm (isn't there always a 'bad storm' on that mountain?!?)....this one had already claimed the lives of several people....well the weather seemed as if it would get better so we called to check it with the local mountain rescue group.....they gave us the 'real' report...

"It is so bad here that we are telling the expert climbers.....you want to go up...fine. We are NOT COMING for you! That is how bad it is."

Needless to say....trip canceled. (We're crazy....not stupid.)

Unfortunate too....none of us ever had the chance again....not complaining though....we are all alive to HAVE another chance.....I'll take THAT.

Back when we were in college, we'd help SAR up there thru the AMC club. I still follow the incident reports from time to time, although my SAR years are behind me. The MT Washington Avalanche Center publishes select incident reports for each winter season. The things people do are worthy of Darwin awards at times. There is usually a "lessons learned" section at the end that's interesting.

For anyone who's read similar incident reports, you know that the language is very dry and unemotional, just the facts. It can be instructive to review though. Sometimes it's rather blunt:

"According to the party, they were in the lower section of the Escape Hatch when one of them lost his footing and began a sliding fall. Unable to self arrest, he slid approximately 150 feet before slamming into a tree and stopping. The fall resulted in injuries to his back and legs. [more on getting him to a mountain shelter] The patient was reassessed, immobilized on a backboard and transported to Pinkham Notch via snowcat where he was transferred to an ambulance and brought to the hospital. We later learned that the patient fractured two vertebrae in his lower back and had numerous sprains and contusions

Lessons Learned: This was the third sliding fall injury in three days that may have been prevented with a quick self arrest. The surface that all of these occurred on is a very hard icy snowpack from the January thaw, which is difficult to stop on. If you don't arrest your fall immediately you will get out of control fast."

Yeah, sliding 150ft down ice covered mountain into a tree would be painful.

-----
Sometimes, people aren't so lucky:

"01-18-2008: At 9:20 pm on January 18 the USFS Snow Rangers were informed that a solo climber was overdue from his climb in Huntington Ravine. The overdue climber had signed into the winter climbers register at Pinkham Notch with the plan of climbing Central Gully in Huntington Ravine. According to his friends who reported him overdue, he had experience in many gullies in Huntington Ravine and had talked about Odell Gully as another option for his day.

A team searched the access routes into Huntington Ravine between 10:00 pm and midnight on the 18th. Due to snow stability concerns, search teams didn’t enter avalanche terrain until first light the next day to begin searching Huntington Ravine. Shortly after sunrise, the missing climber’s body was found in avalanche debris below Odell Gully. The climber was on top of the debris and died as a result of being avalanched out of Odell Gully. He was put in a technical litter, lowered 500 ft to the floor of the Ravine and transported to Pinkham Notch by the USFS snowcat."


Interesting phrasing: "died as a result of being avalanched out of Odell Gully" You don't often here that as a verb, but, it's common in these incident reports... of course, solo hiking under gale force winds and snow in avalanche conditions is probably not going to win a lot of sympathy.


For your reading pleasure:
http://www.tuckerman.org/accident/accident.htm

"Yeah, sliding 150ft down ice covered mountain into a tree would be painful."

I can remember learn to ski, and hitting a tree at a sub walking pace. THAT hurt (but no long term injuries). When I read "sliding 150ft into a tree" my first thought was OUCH. I pictured both legs compound, plus the back, so I guess you could say "he got lucky"

I too planned a hike up there, but never got there. Now with my limited mobility and other health problems, I'll probably never get to hike again - anyplace.

The good news is I have dropped 27lbs (with a LONG way to go) but my leg is still messed up (MRSA infecting an ulcer is NOT a fun thing)

Hey kc2ixe, good job on losing the 27 pounds!

-Blast

Thanks

Frankly, I'm well into the morbidly obese range. I've dropped to mere "overweight" before (and most of that would have went away with a panulectomy (aka removing the excess skin). I'm trying again.

I've been 'on the list' for bariatric surgery, but until my leg is healed (can take years) it's no go, and the Dr wanted me to lose 25 or so lbs before the surgery anyway.

I'm going to try to take as much off as I can before hand