Second Edition ETS Survival News Available

Posted by: Doug_Ritter

Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 01:39 PM


http://www.equipped.org/ets_news_0201.txt

Enjoy!
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 02:30 PM

Thanks, Doug! Can't wait to try some Full Of It appetite suppressant, local sporting goods store is getting a shipment later today. <img src="images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 02:32 PM

My kids are addicted to Survivor, one reason I fear for the next generation. I prefer the Survivor-Afghanistan scenario, where you get turned loose in the middle of a minefield with a sharp pointy stick and a pair of nail clippers. The one who makes it out alive - wins! <img src="images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: ScottRezaLogan

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 02:56 PM

And with NO Room for All that Silly Social Politicing! ("Survivor"-I Mean!)

And I Love it how in a Past Survivor Episode, (One of the Few I've ever Really Watched), One of the Guys was Really Laying it Onto One of the Gals!, -For "Useing the Drinking Water to Wash her Hair"! [color:"black"] [/color] [email]Maggot[/email]
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 03:20 PM

I would like to nominate Martha Stewart as one of your first contestants, as well as anyone on the Tyco board of directors.
Posted by: billvann

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 03:46 PM

Thanks for the newsletter, I needed it.

BTW, you didn't mention the new Coast Guard Satellite Uplink Credit Card Acceptance Relay (SUCCAR) system. The new procedure calls for the rescue basket to be lifted within arm reach of the helo crew at which point the would be victim hands over his credit card. The helo crew runs the card through the SUCCAR system to validate the card and credit limit. If it’s rejected or the victim has insufficient credit limit, the crew cuts the basket lose.

The administration defends the policy claiming it will actually improve SAR statistics as Left On Site Emergency Rescuees (LOSERs) are no longer considered victims and will not be included in future reports. Hence they anticipate a nearly 100% success rate. The administration cites their current education policy as the model for this statistical practice.
Posted by: rkt88edmo

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 03:47 PM

It is obvious that Doug's stock is just about to go through the roof and he will be launched to stardom.

Doug, can I get your autograph tattooed on my chest to increase my collector's value?

Look for the big brown box with the telltale airholes on your doorstep.
Posted by: Doug_Ritter

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 04:12 PM

OK, you've passed your audition, you're hired to help write next year's editon... <img src="images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Posted by: JOEGREEN

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 08:41 PM

Doug,
You made my day! The Aron Ralston part was wickedly funny. Keep the Survival News coming!
Posted by: billvann

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/01/04 10:16 PM

And he didn't even mention Leathrmon's plans for a line extention. It's a smaller, more colorful version called the "Jah-uce" So fare they've announce it in "Bone White," Blood Red" & "Steel Grey Matter."
Posted by: bat69

Re: Second Edition ETS Survival News Available - 04/02/04 02:24 AM

Jeeze i have to admit you got me!! I was reading about the "contest" and darned near asked my wife if I could do it!!